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Have a question? Send it in! Questions are answered by Rabbi Bartfeld.
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# 4317 Mourning the Burning
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Q. We are Iy’H making a Bris for our newborn on this coming Friday Erev Parshas Chukas – Bolok. We usually served meat during the Seuda of the Bris of our other children. Yet I heard that it should be avoided on this Erev Shabbos Parshas Chukas (Bolok) is that correct?
A. On question 2246-47 regarding the source for some fasting on Erev Shabbos Parshas Chukas and why would there be a fasting day on Erev Shabbos when we usually avoid it, we wrote: “Magen Avrohom (580: 9) and Mishna Berura (580: 16) quote the Tanya, that on Erev Shabbos Parshas Chukas, ‘yechidim’ or some individuals accustom to fast. (Oz VeHadar Mishna Berura explains that it refers to the Arizal’s teachings (Shaar HaKavannos of Rav Chaim Vital, Drushei Tikkun Chatzos 1 and Pri Eitz Chaim, Shaar Tikkun Chatzos 3).
The reason given, is that on that day (in the year 1242), twenty (or twenty four) wagons replete of Sefarim Gemaros. Talmudic literature including many works of the Baalei Tosafos and other priceless and irreplaceable manuscripts, (it predated the printing age), were burned in Paris by agents of the Church and King Louis IX. Magen Avrohom adds that it is “worthwhile for every Jew to cry for the burning of the Torah.” He then proceeds to tell of a customary annual fast specifically for this purpose, on Erev Shabbos Parshas Chukas. Additionally on year 5408 (Tach) – 1648, two great European communities were destroyed. The cause that it was instituted on the day of the week (Erev Shabbos) rather than on the day of the month, as all other days of fasting are, is because it was spiritually revealed to them that they should fast then, by using the Targum translation on “Zos Chukas Hatorah” Moed Lekol Chai (quoted by Nitei Gavriel – Bein Hamtzarim 1: 1: 3) mentions that on that Friday, as he remembers from his younger years in Izmir, people would refrain from leaving home and would try to arrange all that was needed for Shabbos on the prior Thursday.
Even in his present day, he adds. people avoid traveling from city to city. He further quotes from Kisvei Hakodesh, the tradition to awake early and recite the Kina or lamentation of “Shaali Serufa Baesh.” We may add to the above that the Targum on “Zos Chukas Hatorah” is “Do gezeras Ora’yso” meaning, this is the gezera (decree) to the Torah. There seems to be a different version on the Targum adding a vav or “VeDo” on day “Vav” or the sixth day, Friday, became gezeras ora’yso (Shibolei Haleket 263).The Torah is foretelling the future tragedies that will occur, and we now mourn the great loss to the Torah that happened on that day.
There is no question that the burning of that collection of Seforim in Paris, at a time when every book was painstakingly written by hand and when many were original and irreplaceable, was a most terrible tragedy. It represented the destruction of generations of Jewish learning and work. It’s estimated that the wagons held about 10,000 sefarim and manuscripts. For how many Sages and Baalei Tosafos, it represented the extinction of a life’s work!”
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that although you did not accept or kept this Ta’anis as a Neder or oath, it is proper to be Mattir Neder and perform prior to the fast day an act of Hattoras Nedorim or absolution of oaths and promises as printed in Sidurim.”
In our case the Rov indeed recommends to avoid a meat Seuda on that important day.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/30/2023 10:55 AM |
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# 4316 A Vort on a Vort
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Q. We Be’H are about to do a Vort (engagement) for our daughter, I heard that it should better not be done on the Seventh day of Tamuz is that correct?
A. Nitei Gavriel – Bein Hametzarim 1: 1. indeed quotes Sefer Chassidim (158 p. 162) that mentions that weddings should be avoided on the seventh day of the months of Elul, Shevat and Tamuz. He warns that it may cause the demise of one of the couple. Yet he also cites that some great Chassidic Rabbis got married on that day.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that even the Sefer Chassidim mentions only celebrating a wedding and not just a Vort, that should be permitted.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/30/2023 10:52 AM |
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# 4315 Love Your Dead Friend?
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Q. When someone gives Tzedaka during the Yohrzait of a good friend in his memory, since the friend is not longer alive and there in likely no mitzva of “Vehavata Lereacha” (love your friend) anymore. Which mitzva is actually involved, so he can have the essential and crucial intention for it?
A. It is obvious that helping the poor and destitute is always a great mitzva, however knowing if there is an additional mitzva being complied with in this particular situation may be indeed important.
Generally speaking, we rule that when a person fulfills a Torah Mitzvah, Kavanah or proper intention to comply, is essential in order for it to count. Kavanah means that a person must have in mind that he is fulfilling the Mitzvah of Hashem as found in the Torah, so knowing which mitzva it is seems necessary. This would seem to be the case in regard to Chessed as well.
However, many Poskim have written that although it is required ideally, if one did not have the correct Kavana, the Mitzvah still counts, post facto.
The Chazon Ish was of the opinion that this concept of not receiving credit for a Torah Mitzvah when one does it by rote without intent does not apply in regard to Mitzvos that are between man and man (Toraso Yeh’ge, Miluim #10).
On question 363 regarding intention on social mitzvos we wrote: Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a pointed out that in regards to Kavanah in Mitzvos, there is a difference between the commandments Ben Adam Lamakom, or the ones that involve only complying with the will of Hashem and the ones that additionally benefit others or society too. On the former you need intention, on the latter, it is generally accepted that after the fact you comply with the Mitzvah even if performed without intention, as the benefit was done nonetheless.
However, the Chofetz Chaim holds that kavanah, or intent to perform a mitzvah, is also required and essential for those mitzvos. (Ahavas Chessed 2:23).
In our particular case, Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that since after all a person is still being judged during the Yamim Noraim after his death, as it involves the consequences and effects that his life actually had on the past year, and that judgment is very meaningful for the living, therefore donating Tzedaka in his name, is also part of the mitzva of “Vehavata Lereacha.”
See also question 2104.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/30/2023 10:50 AM |
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# 4314 The Pain of a Stain
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Q. A father who was holding his four year old boy while being covered with his Taalis, and the boy made it wet with urine, after it dried can he use it for davening even if it is stained?
A. Poskim maintain that once urine has dried even if the stain could still be seen, whether it is on clothing, floor or furniture. One can recite Tefilos and learn Torah even when facing it.
However, it is proper and a “Hiddur Mitzva” to always wear a clean Taalis and to also daven in a clean shul.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a is similar.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/30/2023 10:47 AM |
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# 4313 Pray Remind Me
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Q. I truly wonder since we daven for everything and our Tefilos have blessings for every need, how come we don’t have any prayer for having a good memory that is so essential!
A. Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a pointed out that there is indeed a brocho for it in our common Shemone Essreh. It is included in the fourth blessing of “Atto Chonnen” in which we pray for wisdom, intelligence and understanding.
The Rov quoted Rashi (Avoda Zarah 8a) that mentions; “If one discovers that he cannot remember his learning, he may petition (for an improved memory) on the (fourth blessing of Shemoneh Essrei) “Atta Chonen,” or “He who grants knowledge.”
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/30/2023 10:46 AM |
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# 4312 Protect the Good Name
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Q. See question 4302 above. I was wondering Kvod Horav, if even not in Shabbos one may not join the parts of the torn Siddur page when it involves the name of Hashem, and one may be causing the Holy Name to be destroyed when they eventually separate?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that indeed one should avoid the use of a torn page by joining it just temporarily, especially when dealing with Hashem’s different names.
The Rov added that one should avoid using adhesive Scotch tape placed over Hashem’s name, since it is equivalent to erasing that Holy Name as it cannot be usually removed without at least partially removing some of the letters.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/30/2023 10:44 AM |
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# 4311 The Best Kiddush
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Q. Dear Rabbi. I offered to give a Shabbath kiddush and I have the option to have it on Shabbat Korach or Shabbat Chukat. Because of the titles of the Parshiot, is there a preference of one over the other?
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that besides the parsha title, there are both positive and equally not so satisfactory issues in both parshios. Therefore, other external factors should decide and determine which Shabbos is the correct one to donate the kiddush.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/25/2023 1:22 PM |
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# 4310 Can I help You?
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Q. We need to hire a teacher- leader for a summer youth camp to be Mekarev young men to Torah. We have a few options. Is it better to look for a FFB person or an actual Baal Teshuva.
A. On a similar question (3488) regarding: “Our shul is starting a ‘Kiruv” outreach program for neighbors who may want to join and become Frum. They are planing to hire a well remunerated professional ‘Mekarev’ to do the work. They ended with the two best candidates, that as far as the qualities, knowledge and experience are similar. They would like to know if they should give preference to the one who is actually a Baal Teshuva himself or maybe that may be on the contrary detrimental?
To what we answered. One may argue that if one needs a ‘Mekarev,’ to attract and bring close to Torah and mitzvos, someone who has not been keeping anything yet, that Mekarev must be able to identify and comprehend the depth of mind, feelings and experiences of the one seeking a new spiritual life. Since he actually already experienced in person the trials, ordeals and emotions his potential Kiruv candidate is going through, his chances of success are higher.
Moreover, they may be able to share mutual principles and emotions that motivated both to seek a new life.
The Kiruv candidate may not identify at all with someone who is FFB.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that although in other positions such as a Chazan, being a Baal Teshuva may not be recommended, in this particular case he may be indeed the preferred candidate.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu, Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/23/2023 12:21 AM |
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# 4309 Does My Miracle Need another Miracle
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Q. Dear Rabbi. A true miracle happened to a cousin of mine. She was steeping out of a plane carrying her one month old baby and as she exited she tripped and fell with the baby in her hands. By a true Neiss (miracle) she fell backwards on her back and she didn’t roll down the long metal steps, and B’H both her and the baby are OK. Does she have to Bench (recite) Gomel? Her husband was not travelling with her.
A. The Ashkenazi tradition is that women don’t recite the blessing of HaGomel, that is usually done by men in Shul and in public at the reading of the Torah.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that she should recite with lots of of Kavanah and intention Chapter 107 of Tehilim. There are different traditions how to recite it in such an occasion.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/23/2023 12:18 AM |
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# 4308 Casing the Casino
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Q. See question above. Would the same apply to a building that was once used as a casino or another even more immoral establishment?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is also to be lenient when complete remodeling is done. He additionally recommends when possible to use the property for another use a complete year, before turning it into a Beis Hamedrash or shul.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/23/2023 12:14 AM |
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# 4307 Policing the Police Place
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Q. Is it recommended or even proper and permitted to buy for using as a Talmud Torah a building that was used as a police station. It included a jail, that constantly was home for all kinds of criminals and most impure characters. Is it correct? Why is this different than using for the same purpose an abandoned church?
A. On question 1649 regarding davening lekatchila in a shul that was once a Catholic church we wrote:
“Mishna Berura (154: 45) quotes Mogen Avrohom that if the building has been sold and the idols and statues were removed it is permitted, since the building itself was not worshiped. However, in Biur Halocho he mentions that when idols that are worshiped were placed in the building (as is usual in Catholic churches), although the building after being sold and the idols removed is now permitted for common use, it should not be used as a shul.
Many Poskim support this view (Eliyahu Rabba (154:15), Pri Megodim (Eshel Avrohom ibid. 17), Chassam Sofer (Orach Chaim 42), Bnei Zion (63),Maharam Schik (Y. D. 154) et. al.)
Igrois Moishe (O. H. 1: 49) writes that although it became customary in our countries to convert churches into shuls, relying on the opinions of Mogen Avrohom and Mishna Berura, he does not support the view and considers this to be “mous” or repugnant. However, after the fact, he agrees that it is permitted. He recommends to totally remodel the inside of the walls, so the location acquires a new face or ponim chadoshos.
Various denominations of Christian churches do not maintain in their temples any idols that they actually worship and would therefore be permitted when sold and the symbols of their religion are removed.
Chashukei Chemed (Avoda Zarah 47a) mentions that Horav Eliashuv’s zt’l opinion was to be lenient following view of the Mogen Avrohom and Mishna Berura when the inside is redone.
He also permits entering the former church to examine and determine the changes needed
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Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is also to be lenient when remodelling is done. He additionally recommends to use the property for another use a complete year, before turning it into a shul.”
In our case Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that it is permitted.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/23/2023 12:11 AM |
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# 4306 Crumb the Crumb?
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Q. Are crumbs Muktza after Bentching? What about matzah or cake crumbs?
A. Shulchan Aruch (308: 27) rules that even crumbs less than a Kezais size one is permitted to remove from the table since they are used for animal feed. In our days some save them to be fed to the free backyard birds after Shabbos. See Mishna Berura (110).
Chut Hashoni (3: 60: 1) is of the opinion that during the meal one may touch bread crumbs since it is the way of common eating.
Piskei Teshuvos (308: n. 339) quotes Orchos Rabenu that Horav Yaakov Yisrael Kanievsky Zt’l was careful following the Mishna Berura’s opinion not to remove the crumbs remaining on the table after the meal directly, but rather to use another item (such as a piece of cardboard).
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is similar.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/23/2023 12:08 AM |
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# 4305 Tzedek Taxes
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Q. How do I calculate the tzedakah on the sale of a house? If I still have a mortgage, do I deduct it as well as the original cost of the house? What about the real-estate, land transfer tax, HST and other fees? What if this leads me with a shortfall to buy another property? Can I use the profit and have my estate take care of the final cheshbon?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that if one would be unable to pay for the new house if he gives at that point Maaser after having deducted all expenses that had to be paid, he may delay the Maaser to the future after he aquires the needed new house and can actually afford it.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/23/2023 12:03 AM |
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# 4304 The Date changed the Date
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Q. Is there a Gemara that says that a man should not be seen talking in the street to even his wife are daughter for fear that someone would think he was doing something wrong? If so, do qe follow this? What about people who are on a date? Do they have to date indoors?
A. In our days even Kollel people walk in the streets with their family, Dating is also commonly done in public to avoid issues of Yichud.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that indeed in some Chassidic circles the above is avoided and one should keep the traditions of his family.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/23/2023 12:00 AM |
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# 4303 Lost The Silver Spoon?
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Q.There was a story about a young kallah who called the Rabbi crying that she just made her chassan a fleshing meal and accidentally put the milchig (silver) spoon into it and was upset that she would have to throw it away. The Rabbi said: "Didn't you just get married? Was the spoon actually used?" Fortunately, it was designated but not actually used so there was no problem with it.
Now I am wondering about the spoon. Is it a minhag not to change an item from fleishig to dairy and vice versa? If so, do we have to follow it? Can she purposely rekasher it?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that in this particular case one may be lenient especially if it involves Sholom Bayt.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised byHorav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/22/2023 11:57 PM |
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# 4302 Could we All Join You
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Q. (See question above). If there is a torn page in a sidur and I can’t read the page, can I just join the two parts together during Shabbat davening without attaching them in any way?
What happens if one places the two pieces inside a plastic envelope and that holds them a bit together, and they are used for reading the Shema during the Shabbat Seuda at Friday night?
A. Poskim are lenient when one has not another proper sefer available (Teshuvos Rema 119, Mishne Halochos 6: 89, Shmiras Shabbos K’ 28: 3).
Regarding if the two pieces are placed inside a plastic envelope that helps to hold them together, Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that it should not be used during Shabbos even when needed for reading the Shema.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
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Posted 6/22/2023 11:49 PM |
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# 4301 Read This
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Q. If there is a torn page in a sidur and I can’t read the page, can I just join the two parts together during Shabbat davening without attaching them in any way?
A. Poskim are lenient when one has not another proper sefer available (Teshuvos Rema 119, Mishne Halochos 6: 89, Shmiras Shabbos K’ 28: 3)
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Posted 6/18/2023 10:38 AM |
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# 4300 Ask Me Another..
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. Q. Another question Kvod Horav. I impart a very necessary and essential weekly Halacha shiur on the laws of Shabbat in my shul, and I explain very needful and indispensable information on what it involves to observe Shabbat properly. Since time is short and of essence, should I dedicate some of it at the end of the shiur for questions and answers?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that the question answer time is extremely essential so the listeners can truly understand what has been said, and will not commit Chilul Shabbos by mistake. Definitely some time should be dedicated to it.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit’a
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Posted 6/16/2023 1:04 PM |
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# 4299 Pick and Choose
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Q. Kvod Harav. I as a Rabbi, was offered to enact two very different weddings on the same time but at different locations, and I cannot do both. One is a common young Frum couple, the other is an elderly couple in their late eighties that lost their partners and are getting married just to keep company.
Which marriage should I choose to perform?
A. Although, as you told me, the elderly couple are unable to have marital relations at their age, Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that the wife still has to immerse in a mikva after following the usual traditions.
The Rov also maintains that the usual brochos are recited at the chupa of the elderly, followed by the customary Yichud seclusion.
The Rov’s Shlit’a opinion is that although it is a very great mitzva to help the elderly couple in their quest to enjoy relief of loneliness and obtain such necessary mutual help at that difficult age, it is still a greater mitzva to perform the wedding of the young couple, that is able to procreate and establish a new family with children.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit’a
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Posted 6/16/2023 1:01 PM |
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# 4298 Hold on to the Baby?
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Q. I know there is a minhag for pregnant women or those of childbearing age not to go to a funeral. Is there a Halacha or minhag not to bring babies to a funeral or Shiva house?
What can be done when suddenly the mother has to attend the Levaya of a close relative or friend and does not have a babysitter?
A. Indeed different traditions are quoted by Poskim regarding women attending a funeral or entering a graveyard.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that one should follow his own minhagim and the customs of the local Chevra Kadisha and Beis Olam (cementery).
The Rov also mentioned that in need one may bring a baby to a funeral procession, funeral home or a Shiva house as long as it does not disturb the others present.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit’a
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Posted 6/16/2023 12:57 PM |
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Important Numbers
