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Have a question? Send it in! Questions are answered by Rabbi Bartfeld.
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#248 Questioning what is written in the Torah
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Q. I attended this week a parsha shiur where it was mentioned that Moshe was at fault for questioning Hashem on his promise to help the Jews. How come then we are allowed to ask all kind of questions on what the Torah or Hashem say in the chumash?
A. Rambam, mentions as the first of the Thirteen Principles of Faith (Commentary on the Mishnah, Sanhedrin 10, 1) "I believe with complete faith that the Creator, blessed be His name, is the Creator and Guide of all the created beings, and that He alone has made, does make, and will make all things". As such we are to believe that everything He does is done for the utmost best and care, and we accept His designs and decisions.
When we pose a question on the events related in the Torah we are not questioning the validity or soundness of Hashem's decrees, rather their meaning and interpretation and that is permitted and encouraged.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 1/18/2013 1:25 PM |
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#247 Expressing opinions regarding the appropriateness of a shidduch
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Q. When asked about a potential shidduch, is it permissible to express an opinion regarding the appropriateness of the match (for example, how well the families are suited to each other), or do you have to stick to the facts as you know them personally?
A. Pischei Teshuvah (O. H. 156) writes that although the Magen Avraham and the mussar sforim write at length concerning the prohibition of lashon hara, there is an even greater transgression. That is refraining from informing another about a situation in which he can be victimized, thus violating the injunction "You shall not stand by the blood of your brother." (Vaykro 19:16)
However, Chofetz Chaim (H. Lashon Hora 10,2) rules that in a shiduch information request, one is allowed to convey only factual data. The knowledge of the particulars also has to be generally first hand or from one's own experience and personal observation.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit"a opinion is that it is prohibited to express one's own personal feelings and subjective evaluation of the suitability of a shiduch, if it cannot be substantiated with facts. This may bring to an end an otherwise good and viable shiduch. However, if one is specifically asked for a personal opinion, he may offer it, as long as he makes it clear that this is only his particular and unproven point of view.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 1/10/2013 5:40 PM |
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#246 Pretending to be a customer to see how competitors are pricing out jobs
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Q. I need to see how my competitors are pricing out jobs. They are not Jewish. Can I pretend to be a customer and get them to provide me with a quote for a job? Or is this a problem?
A. The Mishna in Baba Metzia (58b) mentions "Just as there is wronging in buying and selling, so is there wrong done by words". Therefore one must not ask another, 'what is the price of this article?' if he has no intention of buying. This is codified in Shulchan Aruch (C. M. 228, 4). The Talmud (Chulin 94a) quotes Shmuel's opinion that it is forbidden to deceive people including gentiles. This is codified too (ibid. 228,6).
Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a reckons that since there is a possibility, however unlikely, that the price offered by one of your competitors is low enough to entice you to buy directly from him and then resell the product, provide other services to you customer and still make some profit, asking for a quote is not misleading.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 1/7/2013 12:37 PM |
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#245 Can a well-toasted slice of bread be considered a Shaleim?
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Q. I have heard that if a piece of matzah is broken and I place it into the oven to bake further until the broken edge browns, that this piece has the status of a Shaleim and can be used as one of the Lechem Mishnah.
Assuming this to be correct, can a well-toasted slice of bread be considered a Shaleim and how browned must it have become?
A. It has become an accepted practice to re-bake or flame the edge of a broken matza to turn it into a shleimo (Seder Haoruch 22,4 – Maadaney Yom Tov ch. 122 – Palgey Mayim 21 – Sidur Pesach Kehilchoso p. 22).
Poiskim disagree as to how much of the matza should be missing to make this necessary, also if the roundness of the matza has to be restored and if it can be done on Yom Tov (Shaarey Teshuva 274,1 – Maadaney Yom Tov ibid.).
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit’a opinion is that the above does not apply to turning a slice of toast into a complete "sholem" bread, as after all, it would be recognized by all as only a well browned slice of bread.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 1/4/2013 11:51 AM |
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#244 Toveling and Kasheing stored new dishes that look used.
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Q. I bought a set of china dishes about 6 years ago when my husband and I got married.
It was service for 12 but at the time we decided to just tovel half the dishes and tovel the rest as needed.
This shabbos we happen to need the extra settings. I went to tovel the other dishes today, and noticed on the dinner plates that A. there was no sticker like the other plates had, B. there was a yellow residue on two of the plates.
When I first noticed there were no stickers, I though I may have a vague recollection of toveling these dishes or at least preparing them to be toveled all those years ago, but I cannot be certain. It is possible that we did tovel them at some point and even use them, but I really cannot remember.
I'm concerned that they may have been used and sold to us as new. I have no idea.
What is the status of the plates? Can I use them?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit"a opinion is that you do not have to be concerned that the dishes were used prior to your purchase. You should tovel the dishes without a brocho. (in general, Poiskim maintain that china or glazed earthenware dishes should be immersed without a brocho)
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 1/2/2013 12:53 PM |
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#243 Refusing an Aliya.
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Q. In my shul the Gabbai hands out cards to those who will be called up for an aliyah, indicating for which aliyah the congregant will be called up. On occasion I receive the card for an aliyah for which I feel I am not fit. Examples are: the Haftarah on Shabbas Shuvah or on a Taanis Tzibbur. I feel that someone special should be one who calls on the congregation to do T'shuva or to seek out Hashem. And I am not special enough for that position.
I understand that would I be called up for any aliyah I may not refuse, as this is an affront to the Torah. But perhaps the cards do not create this obligation.
May I refuse the aliyah? And if I accept the card, may I return it with the refusal until the point where I am called up?
A. The Talmud (Brachos 55a) teaches "Three things shorten a man's days and years: To be given a scroll of the Torah to read from and to refuse". Although the Rif, Rosh, Meiri and others did codify this statement, Rambam, Tur and Shulchan Oruch, did not. Eliahu Rabah (139, 2) explains that the Talmudic adage applied only on earlier times when each person called would read the Torah himself, unlike in our days when the Baal Koreh reads aloud.
Chidah in Chaim Shoal (13) mentions the above, as the reason for the Sephardic tradition not to call to the Torah using one's name (see also Halichot Olam 7,195, and Torah Lishma 95).
If there is a valid reason for not wanting the aliyah, a person can refuse, as when the called reads himself and is unprepared (Mishna Berura 139: 1), when he is unable to contribute for Tzdaka and will be embarrassed not to make the accustomed Misheberach (Torah Lishma 428), he stammers (Maayan Omer 7,9), or is afraid of Ain Horah, as when called right after father or brother were given an aliya (Yalkut Yosef 2 p. 118).
However, Chashukei Chemed (Bava Metzia 22a – Yuma p. 307), expresses doubt when a Rabbi refuses an aliya, due to the uncertainty of the sincerity of the one who paid and is now granting the honor of the kivud given to him.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit"a opinion is that even when not called by name, one should not refuse because he thinks himself as undeserving. On the contrary, that is the appropriate indication of being truly worthy.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/28/2012 12:37 PM |
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#242 Listening to a Torah tape on the Nit'l night
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Q. Can you listen to a Toiro tape on the Nitl night?
A. This Shayleh actually is mentioned responsa Chai Binyomin (p. 301) where he argues that although you comply with the mitzvah of learning Torah just by listening and thinking (O.H. 47, 4 and Biur Halocho ibid.), since you do not make a brocho, (see Mishnah Berura ibid.) this form of learning may be different enough to permit it on Nit"l night.
Nitey Gavriel (Hanukah end of Volume p. 247) also permits thinking Torah thoughts on Leil Nit"l, basing this conclusion on the opinion that angels do not know the thoughts of humans.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/25/2012 7:50 PM |
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#241 Learning the halochos and customs of nit'l on nit'l
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Q. Can you learn the halochos and customs of nit'l on nit'l?
A. On the prior question, it was mentioned that Nitey Gavriel (End of the Chanukah volume) quotes eight different reasons for not learning Torah on Nit'l Night. One of the reasons (p. 245, #2) cited in the name of Korban Nessanel, is that it is due to mourning.
It is similar to the prohibition on learning Torah on Tisha Beav, as Torah learning effects happiness and those are occasions of grief, loss and anniversaries of persecution for us. It would stand to reason, that just like in Tisha Beav you may learn the laws that pertain to that day or about the sad experiences, stories and happenings related to the date, so it would during Nit"l.
Indeed the Zichronos L'ben Yerushalaim (R' Y . Yelin - Tome II p. 19) relates that the Zais Raanon (The Gaon of Kutnah) would gather all his talmidim and use the occasion for exactly that purpose.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/25/2012 7:48 PM |
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#240 Learning on Leil Nit'l
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Q. Dear Rabbi, A couple of time sensitive questions; I belong to a chasidishe mishpocho that doest not learn on nit'l, but I do have my shiurim that I don't want to miss. Do I have to be matir neder if I want to attend tonight?
A. The name "Nit'l" is said to originate from the Latin and connotes birth, as in; Natalis dies Domini, or birthday of the Lord (Sefer Nitzochon, p. Bereshis). It is the tradition of avoiding learning Torah, mainly on the eve of the 25th of December (there are different traditions as to the exact date and the amount of time involved). Chasam Soifer (7,31) and Mekor Chaim (O.H. 155) testify to the widespread adherence to this Minhag in their days. It also goes back many centuries. One of the Rishonim, the Baal Harokeach (c.4960 - 1200) mentions it, as quoted in Megaleh Amukos (Parshas Terumoh. Nitey Gavriel (Hanukah, end of volume) cites eight different reasons and sources for the tradition. Today, it is kept mainly in Chasidic circles and is totally disregarded by Sefardim, those who adhere to the Lithuanian-Ashkenazi traditions and many mainstream Yeshivos. It is important to mention that many of those who do observe Leil Nit'l, sleep until midnight, and then learn for the rest of the night.
Although the answer to this question may depend on the background of the Poisek you consult, Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit"a opinion is that it is not necessary to be matir neder, in order to learn Torah on the Nit'l night.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/25/2012 7:44 PM |
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#239 Disclosing allegations when suggesting a Shidduch.
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Q. Investigating a potential match for a young lady, We came across information on a website saying the man had allegedly molested several boys in the past. When the shidduch suddenly came to a halt, it was discovered that the shadchan was aware of the information all along. The shadchan had decided to make a unilateral decision after speaking to the accused man in question on several occasions and decided his innocence. The shadchan has stated that there are two others that she intends to broach the shidduch to and does not feel the need to disclose this information as she contends the man was wrongly accused and the girl should ask forgiveness from the potential match because of her refusal to meet with him.
We are horrified and feel this is a breach of lo samod al dam reyecha and the young woman was traumatized by the whole incident particularly because the shadchan broached the shidduch knowing this information.
Halachically, what should be done to stop the shadchan from continuing to set-up unsuspecting young women with this alleged perpetrator?
What is the obligation and extent that this information should be made known to others?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit"a opinion in regard to this and similar shiduchin questions is that great care should be taken by a Shadchen, organization or anyone involved in matchmaking or marriage counselling, not to accept allegations as an established truth. Often the reputation of a person is irreversibly destroyed by unproven assertions of misconduct, that end up as either totally or at least partially false. Half truths often snowball into perceived terrible mistaken "realities".
However, he maintains that if indeed there are serious concerns, albeit yet unproven in Bais Din or challenged in court, the shadchen is obligated to bring the information available to the attention of the party involved by the second date. Again, care should be taken to indicate that they are only allegations and yet unproven charges.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/25/2012 7:40 PM |
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#238 Divorced woman covering their hair
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Q. As a divorced woman do I need to cover my hair: when at Shul, in public, all the time?
A. Shulchan Oruch (E.H. 21, 2) rules that Jewish women should not go out with uncovered hair to public places, regardless if married or not. Perisha, Bais Shmuel, Beer Heitev, (ibid. 3 and 5) and others explain that "unmarried" refers to a widow or a divorced woman.
Igrois Moishe (E.H. 1,57 and 4,32,4) rules that in cases of severe economic need, (as the loss of ones job due to keeping this mitzvah) the above-mentioned women are not obligated to comply with the mitzvah of covering their hair. He adds that the same applies when this is a factor in assisting them to remarry.
However, many contemporary Poskim disagree, as they see this as a prohibition and not only a mitzvah (Yesodos Habais Ukedushoso p. 80 - Meir Oz 75,2,10). Some argue that the quality hairpieces available today hardly create hardship.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit"a opinion is indeed to be stringent.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/25/2012 1:29 AM |
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#237 Purchasing an item with other people's money.
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Q. A fellow came into shul before Chanukah and saw 20 bottles of olive oil on the table with a notice that read: "Each bottle 19 shekels, please put the money in the pushka." The fellow figured out that the owner stands to make 380 shekels on the sale. He switched the sign for one of his own that read: "Each bottle 20 shekels, please put the money in the pushka." And took one without paying.
Considering that 20 shekels for that oil is still a great bargain, and the owner will still make 380 shekels, what has the fellow done wrong?
A. An almost exact shailah is to be found in sefer Chashukei Chemed (Baba Metziah 76a), where Horav Silverstein Shlit"a rules that the overpaid money has to be returned to the buyers, even though they willingly paid it. The enterprising fellow is a gazlan, as he took a bottle of oil that he was not entitled to.
Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a agrees with this ruling
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/25/2012 1:15 AM |
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#236 Borrowing money with no means to repay the loan.
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Q. I recently joined a support group for a Torah institution and I became aware that they are about to borrow a large amount of money from a few individuals when they know they will not be able to repay it. Why is this not the same as an individual that borrows and does not pay back and that makes him a goneeff? Should I continue helping this group? Thanks.
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit"a opinion is that if the borrowers know at the time of borrowing, that they can not pay back on time, they are obligated to inform that to the lenders.
However, if there is a distinct and real possibility that they can raise and collect the money needed in time for repayment, they are permitted to go ahead and take the loan.
He added that a mitigating factor would be if the institution owns equity in real property that could secure payment for the loan.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/25/2012 1:12 AM |
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#235 Attending or promoting a year's end party
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Q. As the holiday season approaches is there a problem with attending or promoting a year's end party for your employees?
A. The Talmud (Avoda Zarah 8a) mentions that if "an idolater gives a banquet for his son and invites all the Jews in his town, then, even though they eat of their own and drink of their own and their own attendant waits on them, Scripture regards them as if they had eaten of the sacrifices to dead idols, as it is said (Shemos 34:15), And he will call thee and thou wilt eat of his sacrifice". Shulchan Aruch (Y.D. 152,1) rules accordingly.
Poiskim disagree whether the prohibition applies only to weddings or even to other banquets and feasts. There are also differing opinions if the "heter of eivah" (permission granted to avoid creating hate) applies in this instance or the interdiction to engage in activities leading to intermarriage is more relevant (see Taz and Shach ibid. - Rambam, Maacholos Assuros 17,10,). Other particulars that should be considered are; who owns the venue, who makes up the majority of the attendants and what manner of behavior, dress and alcohol consumption prevails. (Zera Yaakov 8, p. 96).
Although there are different opinions as to the halachik status of today's Gentiles, as a general rule, sefer Yesod Yosef (ch. 81) construes from the Talmud (Megilah 12a) and other sources, that one should avoid when possible the attendance or promotion of such events.
As mentioned there are many variants and details to each particular case, therefore Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a advices to consult a competent Halachik authority in each situation.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/21/2012 12:52 PM |
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#234 Sending gifts to customers or business acquaintances
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Q. As the holiday season approaches is there a problem with sending a gift to customers or business acquaintances?
A. The Talmud (Avoda Zarah 20a) instructs that there are different interpretations to the biblical proscription of "Lo Techonem" (Devorim 7:2) one is; "not to give them free gifts". Who exactly qualifies as "them" and what is a "free gift", is open to Halachik discussion. Shulchan Oruch (Y.D. 151,11) rules: It is prohibited to give a free gift to an idol worshiper you do not know. Taz (ibid. 8) explains that if you know him, it is not considered a "free gift", as you would expect a favor in return. As such, gifts to customers or business acquaintances, even if they were to qualify as idol worshipers are not prohibited.
However, based on a the ban of promoting and encouraging idol worship mentioned in the Talmud (beginning of Avoda Zarah), Shulchan Oruch (Y.D. 148, 5) rules that it is prohibited to send a gift to an idolater on the day of his festivity, unless it is known that the recipient does not believe or worship idol deities. As mentioned in a prior answer, there are different opinions as to which religions are considered idolatry.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit"a opinion is indeed to avoid sending gifts that would reach a Gentile on the day of the celebration. It is better to shun the prior day also.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/10/2012 3:06 PM |
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#233 Mailing season greetings cards
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Q. As the holiday season approaches is there a problem with mailing a season greetings card?
A. The Talmud (Gittin 62a) teaches that in the interest of peace, greeting an idolater is permitted even during their feast days as long as you don't enter his abode. During their sacred days it dictates; "Should he meet him in the street, he should then greet him in a soft voice and with a downcast head". This is too the opinion of the Shulchan Oruch (Y.D. 148, 9). There are different opinions as to whether the Gentiles of today are considered true worshipers and if their beliefs are idolatry or no.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit"a opinion is that sending non-religious, non-specific, generalized season greeting cards is permitted. It is preferable nonetheless, to send them so that they arrive earlier or after the actual celebration day.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/10/2012 3:02 PM |
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#232 Filtering Smartphones
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Q. I have an I phone for a few years witch I use for work and personal. I have on my iPhone installed K9 filter and no use of YouTube, and no access to the app store, all secure by a password witch I asked my wife to enter it and witch I don't know to make my phone as kosher as possible.
I'm due to renew my contract with my phone provider and I can get a new phone, I heard lots of opinions against IPhone so I want to know if I can get a new iPhone with the same restriction I currently have, or I should switch to another phone. Also I want to know if I need to switch phones witch phones are ok Android phones, Blackberrrys considering that I need to use Internet for work.
A. Your inquiry was passed on to TAGTO for a reply.
If you require filtered internet on your smartphone, we would suggest:
1. Blackberry is NOT for you. Browsing and App World can be blocked all together very effectively, but filtering of the browser is not possible.
2. Your current iPhone setup is all possible with the new version 6 OS. therefore, if you want what you have now, iPhone will do everything you ask for. As well, new iPhone filtering software is soon coming out which is all cloud based, meaning the permission are not set on the phone, they are set by logging into a website. This will likely make the iPhone the most convenient filterable smartphone.
3. Android's one advantage right now is that the Ranger Browser filter is web based, meaning you install it on your phone but set the filtering options by logging onto a website.
In conclusion, if you are happy with your current setup, v6 of the OS will not change anything. If however you are considering Android, you will need two apps to mirror what you have today:
a. AppLock: Locking access to the chrome browser, facebook, youtube, etc.
b. Ranger Browser: A new browser you can use for filtered Internet on the android
- Alternatively, NetNanny for the Android is also available and would allow you to keep using the default Chrome browser.
Please let us know if you have any other questions.
TAG Toronto
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Posted 12/7/2012 2:19 AM |
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#231 Making Kiddush using non-kosher wine
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Q. Dear Rabbi,
My husband and I will be posted to an army base in Inuvik for 3 months beginning Jan 2013. We are not religious but we do perform the Kiddush ceremony every Friday night. Normally we use "kosher" wine for the Kiddush. Since kosher wine is not available on the base, can we use regular wine for the ceremony? A friend of mine (she is very religious) told me that the prohibition against using regular non-kosher wine is no longer applicable because wine makers don't worship idols (or something to that effect).
Thank you.
A. The restrictions on non-kosher wine apply today as in the past. (That is indeed why we have certified kosher wine). When kosher wine is not available, you can recite Kiddush on the two chalos (kosher too). You would wash your hands for the bread prior to beginning the Kiddush recitation, and you hold the breads while saying it. You then substitute the bracha of Pri Hageffen with Hamotzi (O.H. 272,9). If no kosher bread is available you may use two matzos. If that is not available either, you may use beer instead.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/7/2012 1:59 AM |
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#230 Kashering counter tops
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Q. We are planning to redo our kitchen. We would like to install counter tops that can easily be kashered for Pesach. Is that possible, or do counter tops of any material need covering for Pesach? If it is possible, what types are easier to kasher? A friend mentioned that some types of granite can be kashered. How does one know which types are acceptable and the best ways to kasher them?
A. Tur (O.C. 451) quotes three different opinions in regards to koshering stoneware. Most lenient is Rav Yitzchok M'simporno who considers rinsing (shtifa) sufficient to render stone utensils kosher for Pesach. On the other extreme, Tur quotes Rav Hai Gaon who maintains that stoneware is similar to ceramics and earthenware. In order to kasher and eliminate any chometz absorbed, they would have to be fired again at the high temperature of a kiln. Tur rules according to the intermediate Rif's opinion. He opines they can be made kosher as other utensils by using regular heat.
In principle, an uncoated slab of granite whose surface is free of irregularities, roughness and is totally polished and smooth can indeed be koshered, by scrubbing clean and then pouring boiling water over it from a connected kettle, (After not using it for twenty-four hours).
The CRC (crcweb.org) provides a list of different counter top materials and what they consider the way to kosher them.
Horav Shlomo Miller's opinion is that in practice, most commercially available stoneware counter tops may not be single slabs but rather composites and they are usually coated. The proper way to use them is by having them scrubbed clean and then totally covered.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/7/2012 1:55 AM |
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#229 Calling people on Shabbos so they wont worry and call the Police.
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Q. There was the following report in the news in Eretz Yisroel. A woman who was supposed to be for Shabbos at her fiancé made a wrong turn and ended up somewhere else. Unfortunately, when she arrived at another house, it was Shabbos already and too late to call. Her parents were informed that she did not show up at her fiancées house and alerted the police. Police searched for her car with the aid of a helicopter. An alert was issued on television, radio, etc. One of her relatives commented that the girl didn't desecrate the Shabbos, but everyone else did while looking for her.
Aside from her first mistake in leaving too late before Shabbos to allow for mistakes, is there anything that she could halachically have done. And how should this incident be viewed?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit"a opinion is that after the shkiah (sunset) but prior to tzeis hakochovim, she should have called police and inform them of the details of her predicament (calling home may have been futile, as they may have not answered the phone anymore).
The call should have been done with a shinui (proper alteration from the normal way of doing it). Such as first removing the handset from its cradle with the elbow and then dialing with the knuckles. This would constitute a shvus (Rabbinical prohibition) done during Ben Hashmoshos (the twilight period after sunset). Rabbinical prohibitions at that time are permitted in a case of great need or while performing a Mitzvah (O.H. 307,22 – 329,19 – Mishna Berura 342,1 – Kinyan Sholom 11).
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit"a
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Posted 12/7/2012 1:52 AM |
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Important Numbers
