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# 5534 The Best Shave!
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- – Q. Kevodo Shlit”a.
As we just ended the mournful period of the Three Weeks for the destruction of the Temple, and now we can take a haircut or shave for those who avoided it before, since today (on 2025) is Monday, is it better to wait and shave for Shabbat on Friday?
A. A main issue is how much you require the hair-cutting or shaving for your regular daily activities. If possible it is indeed may be better to wait and do it Likvod (for honoring) Shabbat.
We must mention that indeed the Sefer Minhag Tov and others mention this tradition as being special for Shabbat Nachamu.
Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit's maintains that he can shave again lkovod Shabbos
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Posted 8/4/2025 1:40 PM |
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#5533 A Long Tea Time?
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- Q. See question above.
Sorry but I must add another question. Is there not a problem drinking wine for Havdala on Sunday night, since as we know some mourning traditions still apply on the morning of Monday?
A. In principle, although we know that the some Nine Days’ restrictions continue until at least midday (Chatzos) of Monday the Tenth of Av. However, Mishnah Berurah and Aruch Hashulchan disagree if on the Sunday night Havdalah– after Tisha B’Av one may drink wine for Havdalah.
Mishnah Berurah concludes that Motza’ei Tisha B’Av is not as restrictive as the rest of the Nine Days, and one may therefore personally drink from the Havdalah wine without necessitating and finding a child to drink.
Accordingly, the bracha of ‘Borei Pri Hagafen’ would be the bracha of choice on the Kos for this Sunday night Havdalah.
Yet, the Aruch Hashulchan disagrees, maintaining that the Nine Days restrictions are still fully in effect until the following day, and it is therefore preferable to make Havdalah on ‘Shaar Mashkin’ (Chamar Medina) and not wine.
A third opinion, that of the Elyah Rabba and Pri Megadim, is that one may use wine, but should give it to a child to drink, similar to the Rema’s ruling on a standard Motza’ei Shabbos Chazon, due to the ‘Nine Days’ restrictions.
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Posted 8/3/2025 6:21 PM |
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#5532 Just Tea Time?
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-Q. See question above.
Q. Is it correct in need to drink then (Sunday night) before Havdalah some plain tea, if that is all that is available?
A. Indeed, Nitei Gavriel (ibid.) also permits drinking before Havdala, coffee and tea without milk, when in need.
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Posted 8/3/2025 6:04 PM |
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#5531 Serving Women Drinks?
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- Q. See question above.
Q. Does the same apply to women?
A. Nitei Gavriel (96: 3) rules in a similar case, that if the liquid actually requires Havdala first, they should recite their own Havdala and not wait for their husband.
Yet, he adds and quotes more dissenting lenient opinions that no Havdala is necessary at all, specially for women.
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Posted 8/3/2025 6:00 PM |
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#5530 Drinks are on the House?
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-Q. Estimado Rabino, larga vida. In our shul in Mexico City when we end the fasting of Tisha Beav tonight, when still in shul people are thirsty and they usually want to drink some water before going home.
Due to local circumstances we don’t keep wine or liquors in shul. I have a number of questions that need immediate answer. First, can one drink water tonight before Havdala is recited on wine?
A. On question 3832 we wrote:
“At the end of the fast of Tisha Beav that this year will be delayed until Sunday, before one makes Havdala can one drink some soda water when very thirsty, if that is all what is available in Shul?
A. Shulchan Aruch (299: 1) rules that one may drink water before reciting Havdalah at the end of Shabbos. However, Poskim debate if that permission applies also to sparkling soda water that one drinks reciting a brocho, even when not thirsty, because of the pleasantness and good flavor it has. (Shevet Hakehosi 2: 124).
Other Poskim are lenient (See Piskei Teshuvos ibid. quoting Shalmas Chaim 273). Horav Dovid Pam and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a maintain that when possible one should be stringent, and just drink tap water.”
In your case, if you have, just drink plane bottled water. If not, then shake forcefully the container to convert it as much as possible into plain water, and then drink before Havdala is needed.
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Posted 8/3/2025 5:56 PM |
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#5529 Wow!!! - Now A New Posek!!!
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! - Q. Question. We did IVF treatments to have a family and B”H we now have 4 healthy children. We still have a few frozen embryos left but due to our age and extreme high costs of each procedure we won’t be using them anymore.
The fertility clinic charges us a yearly premium for storing these embryos, can we ask them to dispose of them?
A. Rabbi Berkovits’s Shlit’a opinion is that one may tell them to dispose of the embryos. Care should be taken to clarify that the embryos may not be used for study or other beneficiaries.
Rabbi Dovid Bartfeld.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu, Horav Kalman Ochs and Horav Dovid Bartfeld Shlit’a
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Posted 8/1/2025 12:52 PM |
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#5528 Need a Drush on Rush and Brush?
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- Q. Dear Rabbi Shlit”a. Can one clean a hat or a coat with a brush during the Nine Days.
A. Poskim indeed permit the above. (Nitei Gavriel 35: 12).
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 8/1/2025 12:48 PM |
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#5527 A Non Shmate Kashe!
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- Q. See question above.
Could one in such a case just wash with a wet towel and even soap, his complete body or at least partially? Would that be permitted for someone that sweats a lot on hot days?
A. As mentioned above for necessary medical need it is permitted.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 8/1/2025 12:44 PM |
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#5526 Run and have Fun!
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- Q. Kevodo, Someone that by his doctor’s advice goes running every day, can he then take a cold shower after, as it is very recommended by his Not Frum doctor?
If not can he at least just use a hand shower water spray?
A. Indeed if it is necessary by medical need it is prermitted by Poskim,
See next question.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 8/1/2025 12:42 PM |
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#5525 Only Dig a Big Wig?
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- Q. See question 5519 above.
Dear Rov, this is a most important question for me, please send me a prompt answer. Can a woman during the Nine Days, just wash a small part of a partial wig that sticks out of her hat?
A. If it is indeed embarrassing it could be done.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 8/1/2025 12:36 PM |
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#5524 Clash on the Wash!
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- Q. I wonder if on this year (2025) on Erev Shabbos Chazon, I can take a hot shampoo shower by the hot mikva, as I usually do? How about staying some time on the steam bath?
A. Remah (Shulchan Aruch O.H. 551: 16) rules that one should only wash even with cold water one’s head, hands and feet.
Yet, he adds that for those who costume to do so always, due to their sweat, they can use warm water on Erev Shabbos.
Poskim permit immersing in a Mikva for one who always does so even if just warm. Steam bath is prohibited.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 8/1/2025 12:33 PM |
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#5523 Have Your Cake and Eat some More?
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– Q. My dear Rabbi & friend.
G-d willing I will be attending a Brith Milah of my new beautiful grandson this coming Thursday (7/31/2025).
Due to the many traveling guest that are expected, the Brith is programmed to take place at midday so they can arrive, and the Seuda will be Flaishig, serving meat (stakes) and truly great wines, as permitted even in the Nine Days.
I wish the Rov could join us. I have one more Shaila. If some people won’t wash for bread and just eat mezonoth and cakes, can they be served also meat and drink wine?
A. Indeed Poskim write that they are included.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 8/1/2025 12:30 PM |
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#5522 Lean on the Clean?
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- Q. Kvod Horav Shlit’a. I will be Iy”H traveling right after Tisha Beav for a Family Bar mitzva and a vacation. Can I give during the Nine Days the necessary clothing to Non- Jewish cleaners so they will be ready when traveling?
A. Poskim disagree, some rule that one can not give them during the Nine Days to the Non- Jewish cleaners, telling them that he will pick them up after Tisha Beav (Magen Avrohom 551: 15, Chaye Adam 133: 2). Others permit (Pri Megadim (115), Mishna Berura (551).
Horav Dovid Pam Shlit'a opines that it seems that the Mishna Berura quoted is actually stringent.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 8/1/2025 12:27 PM |
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#5521 A New Start to the Real End?
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- Q. See questions above. Since this group constantly learns Amud Yomi, however since they do it on line they don’t usually make a Siyum, yet now on the Nine Days they want to join our special siyum in our shul of a Masechta learned there, is that correct to do?
A. As mentioned on last question, if they join by attending usually to a Siyum in a Shul, some are lenient and they can join and be part of it.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 8/1/2025 12:25 PM |
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#5520 The End to the No End Siyum?
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- Q. We are part of group of a Shiur on Amud Yomi, that often does not make a Siyum when finishing a Masechta (Tractate of the Talmud) since they learn on line.
Is it correct that on this occasion (2025) of the ending of Masechet Eirubin, being very close to the Nine Days, they could do one a few days later so they can eat meat and drink wine? Can they eat at their own homes when the siyum was done on line?
A. Poskim write that one eats meat and drinks wine only when the siyum was done and prepared properly.
On question 2612 we wrote:
“Q. What to do about the siyum Erev Pesach? Can it be done by phone, online or zoom?
A. On question 531 regarding someone joining a siyum Erev Pesach while still traveling via telephone we wrote; “On question 198 we mentioned: If you learned together (a tractate of the Talmud) with a group but now are on vacation somewhere else, can you join (the siyum fleishig banquet during the nine days) via telephone? We answered;
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit”a ruled that if you learned the whole tractate you can join the siyum via telephone. However, if you did not study, you cannot just dial – a- siyum. Similar opinions are to be found in other Poiskim (Mekadesh Yisroel, Pesach 256, et al.).
Likewise if one learned the Masechta to be finished and is on his way to the siyum he could join the siyum via telephone or online.”
In our case Shoshanas Yisroel (3: 6) quotes Horav Miller Shlit’a that no siyum should be made.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 8/1/2025 12:22 PM |
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#5519 – Don’t Wash Away?
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- Q. Is a woman allowed to put on a freshly washed Shaitel (wig) during the Nine Days?
A. On question 201 we wrote:
“Q. Can one wear a freshly washed Sheital if its not a new wig?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a ruled that you can use a freshly washed and set wig for Shabbos Chazon, even if it coincides with Tisha B’av.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a"
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Posted 7/28/2025 5:13 PM |
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#5518 Car Care?
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- Q. Dear Rabbi. Due to the nature of our close to constructions neighborhood, my car usually becomes very dirty. Is it correct to wash and remove that dirt during the Nine Days?
A. On a similar question (337) we wrote:
“Q. Can you take your car to a carwash (during the Nine Days) if it is very dirty?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit”a opinion is that there is no prohibition in washing a car during the Nine Days. (See similar opinion in Nitey Gavriel - Ben Hametzorim I p. 174).
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 7/25/2025 11:41 AM |
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#5517 Honoring the Honor!
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- Q. When a man is talking to a woman, is it better to be brief as our sages advise, even if that may seem insulting to the woman involved, as she notices the longer dialog to the other men, or should the principle of “Kavod Habriot” (Honoring people) take priority?
A. Ben Ish Chai teaches regarding the Talmud (Eirubin 53b) that mentions that the important Beruriah complained against Rav Yosi Haglili when he added a just a word to his question regarding which way to follow. Yet he mentions that avoiding insult takes precedence.
Chasam Soffer (on Haftara of Nasso) similarly mentions that even using a longer word should be avoided, as in the angel addressing the wife of Manoach.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 7/25/2025 11:38 AM |
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#5516 Bless the Best Bless!
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- Q. Kevod Horav Shlit”a. Since our Sages gave a very great importance and reward to one who answers Amen after hearing a Bracha, is it after the fact correct if one did so during the reciting of the Brachot of Shema?
A. Indeed our Sages established that whenever a person hears a brocho recited, he should answer Amen to acknowledge his agreement of that blessing.
Chazal viewed and regarded the recitation of Amen truly very highly.
In fact, they thought us that responding Amen is of greater significance than the reciting of the brocho itself. Also they maintain that he failure to answer Amen is considered a gross and great transgression, while responding Amen with great concentration opens the gates of Gan Eden .(Brachos 53b, Chayei Adam (Klal 6:1), Shabbos119b, Rashi Shabbos 119b. See also Shulchan Aruch O.H.124:6, Mishna Berura 124:24).
The letters of Amen are the root letters of the word Emunah, belief or trust. By responding Amen one declares: "I believe in the bracha that I have just heard and I affirm that it is true”.
However, Horav Aharon Miller Shlit”a maintains that the above only applies when it is correct to answer it and not when it should be omitted.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit’a
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Posted 7/25/2025 11:36 AM |
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#5515 – Purchasing or Purifying?
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Q. Dear Rabbi. What is more correct to do during the Nine Days, when taking care of a patient that is hospitalized. Is It better to Wash the used unclean clothes, or if one can afford it, is it best buying new ones?
A. Horav Aharon Miller Shlit”a opinion is that if it is easier and affordable to acquire new ones, that can be used latter, that should be done.
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Posted 7/25/2025 11:28 AM |
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