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# 3382 Most Eloquent Silence
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Q 3. (See questions 3379 - 80 above) Could I rotate the hours of the Tzom Dibbur, or do they have to be static, for example, from 8am to 10am?
A. On question 3354 regarding how to tell others that one is engaged in a Taanis Dibbur we wrote: Some Tzadikim like Horav Sholom Schwadron zt'l who often kept a Taanis Dibbur, would simply keep on repeating the Tehilim that they said by heart and just pointed to their mouths. The ones who were familiar with him, understood that it was one of the occasions of Taanis Dibbur.
It is interesting to mention that Horav Schwadron, was one of the most popular speakers and a true master of words, yet it is known that he did not speak on Monday and Thursday and often Shabbos as well. In addition, during the forty days from Rosh Chodesh Elul to Yom Kippur, he never uttered a word except for davening or learning.
See also question 487 regarding the redeeming a fast for the dropping Tefilin. Chaim Shoal (1: 12), maintains that the aged or ill, can redeem that fast if it will affect their learning, by keeping a Taanis Dibbur (restrain from speaking non- Torah conversations) for a day.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that as mentioned above one may accept this important type of fasting, according to what one is able to do.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a
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Posted 10/7/2021 10:36 PM |
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# 3381 Fighting Talk
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Q.2. (See question 3380 above) As I have to deal with my husband's caregivers, and they look for instructions, could I interrupt the Tzom just to give short and to the point instructions and then continue, or do I have to start all over again?
A. Horav Chaim Kanievsky Shlit'a (Shoneh Halachos, Moadim, 572: 10, page 217, n. 2) is quoted as ruling that one need only refrain from “idle words.” However, if one must speak to perform a Chesed, act of help to others or other important matters, he may speak up. Furthermore, he concludes that if one’s wife requires some conversation, this, too, is not forbidden.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that when one takes on to follow this tradition, one should specify that it carries these exceptions. As mentioned above all should be accepted "Beli Nedder."
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a
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Posted 10/7/2021 10:28 PM |
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# 3380 Fast Talk
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Q. I have been doing Tzom Dibbur (a fast or a day of restriction on speaking) on Yom Kippur for several years. This year, I decided to do a Tzom Dibbur for part of the day every day, and I have some questions:
1). May I do a Tzom Dibur every day for just a couple of hours a day?
A. Mishna Berura (571: 2) quotes that when one desires to accept a day of fasting for redemption or Teshuva, it is better to take on a Taanis Dibbur and abstain from talking anything besides Tefilah and Torah. He adds that from this type of fasting one does not risk any health issues and bodily weaknesses.
He also mentions the letter of the Gaon of Vilna, namely: “Until the day one passes from this world, one should deprive himself, but not necessarily from food or other basic necessities, but by controlling one's mouth and desires, which is actually the foundation of Teshuvah. This is more powerful than any fasting and self-imposed suffering, and every moment that a person closes his mouth, he merits the ‘hidden light’ that no angel or living being can even imagine.”
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that one can accept a Taanis Dibbur even for a few hours a day and it carries the equivalent benefit given to them.
One has to be careful to say "Beli Nedder" or no promises, oaths or wows are being taken before any such acceptance.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a
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Posted 10/7/2021 10:11 PM |
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# 3379 Oppose or Attract?
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Q. When I come (to shul to be) from the Assara Rishonim there is a person who comes and tells me Lashon Hara and disturbs my learning. Is it better to come later, since If I refuse to listen to him he will get offended and he is lonely with no family.
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that you should explain to him carefully and nicely the terrible sins involved when speaking Lashon Horaa and engaging in Bitul Torah.
In addition, you may offer him to learn a bit with him at that time.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a
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Posted 10/7/2021 10:05 PM |
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# 3378 Is Early Better than First?
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Q. On question 2998 regarding if it is better to be from the Assara Rishonim or to daven Vasikin. you wrote: "Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that it is preferred to daven Vasikin (at sunrise), than being from the first ten, when there is no better choice.
Yet on question 3361regarding if davening Vasikin (praying at sunrise) in a minyan of 13 people on Yom Kippur would override being from the Asara Rishonim (First Ten) in a Yeshiva minyan where 500 people will come after me, you wrote: "Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that It is better to daven properly with the right Torah crowd and feelings at the Yeshiva minyan. Besides, by being also from the first ten, one would be entitled to a similar reward given to the all so many.
The Rav told me before that vasikin has precedence over Assara Rishonim. Did the Rav change his mind, or rather there are other factors that make Assara Rishonim the better choice?
A. As is obvious from the answer above it all depends on the factors involved.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a
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Posted 10/7/2021 9:56 PM |
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# 3377 Inviting Ghosts to the Feast?
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I heard recently (Izkor Shemini Atzeres) from our Rabbi that we invite during Izkor the Neshamot (souls) of our parents and grandparents and other dear ones to come join us and share the Yom Tov with us. I honestly think it is a very weird and bizarre idea to say the least. Before I challenge him, since he is a Talmid Chacham I would like to know your open minded opinion if there is a chance he is right. Is there?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit'a in principle did agree with you. However, the fact is we do invite during Sukkos the Ushppizin (souls of the Seven Fathers of our Nation) to join us. Some even have the minhag to set an empty chair for them to sit in the Sukka.
It reminds us of Kisso Shel Eliahu Hanavi, or the chair set in every Bris Milah for Eliahu Hanavi to join us and also sit with us, or the cup of wine we prepare for him to drink during the Seder of Pesach, when we open the door for him to enter and share with us.
There are many reliable stories of people who were actually saved by long gone Tzadikim that came to their rescue and gave them the right advise or help in times of great need.
Searching further, I encountered a similar idea in the Drashos El Ami (1: 23) by Horav Amiel zt'l, (Rav Harashi of Tel Aviv - Yafo) that we do invite the long gone souls to be with us during Izkor.
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Posted 10/3/2021 3:19 PM |
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# 3376 It All Adds Up
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Q. During Simchat Torah due to the lack of space, we had to serve Kiddush inside the large Suka that we have in our shul. Is there a problem of "Baal Tosiff" or adding to the mitzvot that Hashem gave us, since we do not sit anymore in the Sukka on that day? Would it be sufficient to announce publicly that one should not have any intention of complying with this mitzva? Does one have to cover the Sukka also?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that one may bring into the Sukka a disposal bin one is not allowed to have in the Sukka during the Yom Tov, and that suffices. (That is the procedure used at the Toronto Kollel itself)
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/30/2021 10:43 PM |
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# 3375 Murky Waters?
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Q. I sleep in a Sukka with two other people but we have only one bowl for Negel Vasser. (Water to be used for washing hands when one wakes up. After washing the water is considered to possess a spirit of impurity). May I wash over the bowl and then leave it for the other ones to wash into when they awaken, or is it necessary to spill it out? Also I don't have access to the house so I can't spill it out right away.
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that one does not need to dispose immediately of that water and can be temporarily be left in the Sukka.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/30/2021 10:23 PM |
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# 3374 A Balancing Act
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Q. It became popular in some places to use during Hoshanos on Sukos, when doing Hakofes, a little siddur that one attaches with a type of clip to the basket-holder attached to the Lulav and the Haddassin and Arovos. That is a good way to be able to hold the Lulav and Esrog with both hands (as you wrote that it is required) and the necessary Siddur.
Is that permitted? After all one is using the Lulav as an object to hold that siddur, and it should not be allowed.
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that since he is not attaching the clip directly to the Lulav itself, but only to the basket - holder that serves it, it is permitted. Others recommend attaching the clip to one's sleeve.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/30/2021 10:11 PM |
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# 3373 The Sooner the Better?
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Q. Is it correct that one should dismantle his Suka immediately after the end of the Yom Tov?
A. Nitei Gavriel (Sukos 103: 5, p. 476) indeed quotes from the Talmid of the Arizal, the Seder Hayom, that one should dismantle the Suka straight after the end of Yom Tov, since it shows then that the Suka was build only with the intention of the mitzva. However, he writes that just covering the Suka with a cover that protects from rain suffices. (See also similar in Chabatzeles Hasharon p. 871 and 820).
Doleh Umashke (p. 260) mentions the above question and quotes that the Gaon of Vilna would see to eat some chametz immediately at the end of Pesach, to similarly demonstrate that the avoidance of eating chametz before, was done only with the intention of keeping the mitzva of Hashem.
However, his own opinion is that he has not heard of that minhag and people don't usually do it.
Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a opinion is similar.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/30/2021 10:05 PM |
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# 3372 Grinding into Grinding
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Q. Can one use a hand held disposable pepper grinder during Yom Tov?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that he should do so with a shinui or a change from the normal way of turning the parts of the grinder.
The Rov pointed out to a Tosafos (Beitza 14a) that one is blessed with a double blessing when he does all the grinding needed before Yom Tov,
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/30/2021 9:59 PM |
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# 3371 Abandon Ship?
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Q. Is it correct for someone of the essential ten composing the minyan, to leave the shul because of the closeness to the Plag Hamincha and daven somewhere else?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that he should not leave the shul without a minyan.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/30/2021 9:53 PM |
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# 3370 Showing Feelings for Others
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Q. We have a maid that comes to help doing house work. She carries a necklace with a crucifix, can she enter like that to clean the Suka?
A. I had personally experienced a far more testing episode while I was the Chief Ashkenazi Rabbi of Mexico. By Government decision and to help coordinate essential needed changes to the constitution, the Cardinal of Mexico and head of the Catholic Church in that country, would work together with the heads of other religions to create the modification in the law of the land, that would equally benefit even the small religious groups.
The Cardinal would visit me as a courtesy once a year. He preferred to join us with his top secretaries on Sukos. Yet he was courteous and polite enough to cover his crucifix before entering our house, and so did the others.
I have often told that story to our helpers and they well understood the meaning of it. You may use it also.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is similar.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/30/2021 9:47 PM |
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# 3369 We Can Accept This
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Q. Should one avoid accepting Shemini Atzeres early because then he loses out on the mitzvah of Sukka? Could one just be mekabel the issur melacha?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that even if one accepts Yom Tov early, he may still continue sitting in the Suka. However, one must recite the brocho of Leishev Basuka before the acceptance of Shemini Atzeres and not after.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/26/2021 6:09 PM |
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# 3368 An Honest Mistake
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Q. By mistake in our shul on the first day of Chol Hamoed Sukot we took out two Sifrei Torah as is usually done on Chol Hamoed Pesach, instead of only one, as is done on Sukot. However, we only read as is indicated, the first one.
When we replaced back the two Sefarim, was it correct to put first back the one that we did not read at all, or should we have done the opposite?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that the correct way in this unusual situation is to follow what is usually done and the last Sefer to be taken out, is the first to be replaced back in the Aron Hakodesh, even if it was not used.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/24/2021 6:32 PM |
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# 3367 The Real Beauty of a Mitzva
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Q. If someone is offered to buy at a good price a very beautiful silver box for his Esrog should he go for it? He did spend already a large sum on the Esrog itself.
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that it is better to donate the money for the help of needy families with children during Yom Tov.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/23/2021 6:31 PM |
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# 3366 Honoring the Decorations?
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Q. If someone builds the Suka weeks before Yom Tov, should he also place the decoration early?
A. Although it is usually recommended to start all mitzvos as early as possible (Zerizim Makdimin), Kovetz Halachos maintains that it is better to place the decorations closer to Sukos so they will look fresh and clean.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is similar.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/23/2021 6:22 PM |
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# 3365 Right on the Time
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Q. It says that one should begin putting up the Suka on the night at the end of Yom Kippur and then finish it on Friday. Can one do fixing of the Suka Erev Shabbat after Chatzos (midday)?
A. Mishna Berura (626: 2) quoting P'ri Megadim rules that on Erev Shabbos one should only work on the Suka until a half hour after Chatzos.
However, Shulchan Aruch (O.H. 251: 1) mentions two opinions, and the second one maintains that one can do regular work on Erev Shabbos until Mincha Ketana and that is about three and a half hours (Zemanios) after Chatzos or around three thirty in a day of twelve hours. Mishna Berura there (ibid. 3) rules that one can be lenient.
Bikurei Yaakov (5) quotes a list of Poskim that support that view. They recommend that one should have already ended by then all the Shabbos preparations.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that one can certainly be lenient regarding the great mitzva of building a Suka.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit’a
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Posted 9/23/2021 6:07 PM |
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# 3364 Bright and Early
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Q. One who accepts Shabbos an hour early (for the Segula of Tosefes Shabbos, which brings bracha), should the same be done for Yom Tov? Are there any exceptions? Is accepting Shabbos an hour early a Neder?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion that the Segulos and Brochos for accepting Yom Tov early, are similar to Shabbos and are equally encouraged.
The early valid acceptance is after the time of Plag.
All good added traditions and minhagim that one decides to accept and keep, should always be taken and done 'Beli Nedder," specifically without any promise, vow, oath or similar pledge. The above is usually included in the Hatoras Nedarim declaration on Erev Rosh Hashana.
Rabbi A.Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a
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Posted 9/22/2021 10:17 PM |
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# 3363 Let's Have a Good Look
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Q. I have seen some people who seem very Frum check their Esrogim with a magnifying glass. Is that really necessary or even recommended?
A. Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion that on the onset it is not necessary at all. However, if there is a doubt and a Shaila, in order to clarify the magnifying glass could be helpful.
Rabbi A.Bartfeld as advised by Horav Shlomo Miller and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a
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Posted 9/22/2021 9:54 PM |
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