Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1
Talking about someones poor financial status is considered lashon hora. ex: "my uncle is in debt. Every few weeks he asks my dad to lend him money"

Lesson 2
The reason we are not allowed to speak about someones poor financial status is because it can cause them
a) shame and embarrassment
b) financial harm - because people won’t want to lend them money
c) people will not want to get involved with that person or their family because they are not "self sufficient"

(Lashon hora - reporting something negative about someone else that is TRUE)

(Lessons taken from Purity of Speech by C.T. Friedman)

Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1
Many people find it very annoying when they notice that someone is continuously motivated by the need for approval from others and respond with nasty comments and insults. This can be very painful since the trait of seeking approval makes this person more vulnerable than others to disapproval.

Lesson 2
A person who seeks approval is really looking for meaning and purpose and is often based on one’s need for affection and closeness with others. IN a world where people would be kind and understanding to each individual, the need for approval would be decreased.

(Lessons taken from The Power of Words by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin)

Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1
Discussing an employees weak nature can be considered lashon hora as it can cause the person to lose their job, resulting in financial and/or emotional harm. (** if a worker needs to be discussed for constructive purposes, all the rules apply. These will be discussed)

Lesson 2
Shmirat Halashon does not just refer to words we speak, but rather applies to communication as a whole. With this understanding, negative facial expressions (i.e. smirking, turning up ones nose, winking) can be considered lashon hora.

(Lashon Hora - reporting something negative about someone else that is TRUE)

Lessons taken from Purity of Speech by C.T. Friedman

Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1
Fear is a very painful emotion. It is important for us to remember not to needlessly say things to arouse fear in others. We sometimes do this when we hear a problem, exaggerate it, and share it hysterically with others. E.g. if there are financial problems in a country, we will tell people the country is falling apart.

Lesson 2
We need to be careful to not needlessly spread predictions of doom (particularly if you are a person who has a big influence on a lot of people). Differentiate between informing people so they can make constructive plans vs causing unnecessary anxiety.

(Lessons taken from The Power of Words by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin)

Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1
Everyone needs to be valued and it is a tremendous kindness to express appreciation to others. Hard work becomes much easier when you are appreciated for your efforts. A person who uses their power of speech to enhance the lives of others will not use this power for destructive purposes.

Lesson 2
If you have pained others with words in the past (by speaking about or to them negatively), try to make up for it by taking upon yourself to do many verbal acts of kindness.

(Lessons taken from The Power of Words by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin)

Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1
It is very easy to learn the laws of shmirat halashon and just think about how other people insult and cause pain with their words. It is easy to remember times when we have been insulted. This however, won’t help improve our level. It is important that we apply what we learn to ourselves. Think about "when have i ever done this?". This will help us improve and grow.

Lesson 2
It can be considered lashon hora to talk negatively about a food product that was produced by a Jew. Ex: "The challas from the bakery are horrible", "the Kugel was raw". This might seem a big extreme. We are talking about food, not people.... Think though, how would you feel, overhearing someone comment about you "he really doesn’t know how to cook".

(Lashon Hora = reporting something negative about someone else that is TRUE)
(Lessons taken from The Power of Words by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin and Purity of Speech by C.T. Friedman)

Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Friday - 23 Heshvan

Lesson 1
We learned that talking negatively about food produced by a Jew can be considered lashon hora. People don’t realize that by degrading the food, they can cause the caterer, cook, or bakery to lose prospective customers. They can also be causing others to feel repulsion towards the food. As I am sure you realize, this is not constructive.

Lesson 2
If you have tasted bad food, and want to provide constructive critique by helping the cook improve their skills, voice your complaints to the cook directly (in a pleasant manner of course). How does discussing this with others help change the situation?

Shabbat 24 Heshvan

Lesson 1
There is a very common mistake of which people are not aware: it can be considered lashon hora to talk negatively about a Jewish doctor in casual conversation. Ex: "My Doctor is really uncaring, she never returns phone calls".

Lesson 2
If someone asks you specific information about a doctor because they are seriously considering using them, you are allowed to say something. Say the least amount of negativity that will get them to switch dr’s. ex: "I don’t think this Dr is for you. I would suggest this other one instead, my friend was really happy with her care". All the rules of speaking for a constructive purpose apply (These will be explained later).

Lashon Hora = Reporting something negative about someone else that is TRUE)

(Lessons taken from Purity of Speech by C.T. Friedman)

Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1
Very often people fail to express appreciation to others because they assume those people realize that you are grateful. In reality, this is not always the case. If you don’t express your gratitude, they may never know and feel extremely undervalued. Always assume that you need to verbalize the appreciation for the big and little things.

Lesson 2
Showing appreciation for others is a tremendous way to use your power of speech in a positive way. Write short notes of appreciation to as many people as you can. Think about the people you take for granted. How  can you show them they are important? The other person will always be grateful for your thoughtfulness

(Lessons taken from The Power of Words by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin)

 

Lesson 1

A simcha (weddings, bar mitzvah, kiddush etc) is such a beautiful occasion. It really is a shame to ruin it by talking lashon hora (reporting things about other people that are TRUE). Ex.: "The musicians didn’t play well" "the caterer gave such skimpy portions" "The hall was too small, i couldn’t dance".

 

Lesson 2

Strategies to avoid talking negatively about a hall, caterer, MC - avoid questions and conversations that can cause lashon hora to be spoken. Don’t ask "how did the bride’s mom look?" or "were you impressed with the food". (Again - if you need some information for a constructive purpose - i.e. to plan your own simcha, the rules of constructive speaking apply).

 

*(Lessons taken from Purity of Speech by C.T. Friedman)

Please Say/Whisper The Words Out Loud

Just as it is considered lashon hora to speak negatively about a book, newspaper or publication, the same applies to talking about a Jewish production of film. Ex: "that school put on such an unprofessional play".

Lesson 2
Whenever you see a good communicator in action, learn from them as much as possible. Positive approaches to influencing others are much more effective than insults and save us from causing pain with words.

(Lashon Hora-Reporting something negative about someone else that is TRUE)

(Lessons taken from Purity of Speech by C.T. Friedman and The Power of Words by Zelig Pliskin)