- Q. Rabenu Shlit”a, Can I attend a wedding on this coming Monday (June 16. 2025) the 20th of Sivan?
On question 1095 we wrote:
“Q. I have a close friend that is getting married this Sunday, the 20 of Sivan. I heard that there may be an issue in attending a wedding on that day. Is that true?
Should you make an effort to say selichos on that day? (I daven in a shul where they don’t?
A. Yisod Veshoreash Hoavodo (Shaar 9: 11) mentions that the twentieth of Sivan became a day of fasting due to the many tragedies that began on that day.
On the 20 Sivan (1171) – The first blood libel in France – tens of Jewish men and women including three great tzadikim, were burned alive in the French town of Blois on the accusation that Jews used the blood of Christian children in the preparation of matzah for Pesach.
The Shach was from the first that instituted this day as a fast day commemorating the “Gezeiros Tach V’Tat” (the catastrophic Chmielnicki massacres in Southern Poland and the Ukraine in 1648-1649, that ended the lives of approximately six hundred thousand people).
It would seem, however, from his own words, that he had established the fast day only for his family and descendants.
This would explain why, in 1652, the Vaad Arba Hoarotzos (Council of the Four Lands) also declared a fast on 20 Sivan; they were establishing one for the public at large. It became accepted mostly in Poland. (Taz O.H. 566).
Mishna Berura (566: 10, 574: 2) mentions in regards to the reading of Vayechal, that the 20 of Sivan in his days became less established as a day of fasting, and only a few observed it.
He also, by quoting Mogen Avrohom and Pri Megodim, debates about eating at a bris mila or other seudas mitzva on that day and what to do on Erev Shabbos.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that today the twentieth of Sivan is not a well known occasion at all and the minhag for most is not to fast or say selichos. Therefore, one may attend the wedding of a close friend and comply with the biblical mitzvah of rejoicing with the chosson and kallah.
There is also no need to search for a minyan that says selichos, which may be hard to come by, unless one has a family tradition to do so.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a”
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by, Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller, Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu and Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a
Important Numbers
