Q. My cousin is my very close and dear friend and so are our families. By Hashem's design, we surprisingly got engaged almost on the same week and to Chassanim that are also very good friends to each other. We are now planing together our weddings, and as it is obvious, making the two weddings together would be a great expenses saver. So we have a number of questions.
1) We know you cannot perform one Chupa for two couples at the same time. We contacted a promising Shul with a nice wedding hall. Can we perform first my Chupa, as we are the oldest couple, followed immediately by the other?
Is there an amount of time for the separation of the two events?
Can the first couple, after proper Yichud has been done, come back and join the second wedding?
A. Rema (Shulchan Aruch E.H. 62: 2) rules that indeed two Chupos can be celebrated during the same day and in the same place, but only one after the other. Even if two separate Chupos would be set, many Poskim maintain that they should not be done at the same time in the same place. Some abstain of doing the above for two brothers altogether. Shulchan Hoezer (2: p.65), Hanesuim Kehilchosom (5: 65) and others.
In principle, there is no set time to separate between the two Chupa ceremonies. However, Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit'a opinion is that a clear and distinct separation should be done. The Rov recommended that a noticeable group of guest should accompany the first couple after the end of their ceremony and some distinct separating time should also be spent.
The tune or music could also be changed.
The
first couple, after proper Yichud has been done, come
back and join the second
wedding
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a
Important Numbers
