Q. Biur Halacha brings from Chayei Adam that the mishloach manos have to be in accordance with the chashivus of the recipient (if giving to a wealthy person, one has to give something that he will appreciate). Question: What should one do when giving to a millionaire? Does one need to find wine that costs hundreds of dollars? If one gives a bottle of wine that costs only 5 or 6 dollars and some hamantaschen that cost three or so dollars, does he not fulfill the mitzvah according to the Chayei Adam? If one wants to fulfill the mitzvah in a way that will satisfy all opinions, what exactly should one give for mishloach manos?
A. The mitzva of mishloach manos originates from the posuk (Esther 9:19 and 22), which states that Purim was established as a day “of gladness and feasting, (Yom Tov) and of sending portions one individual to his friend and gifts to the poor.
Different reasons are given for the mitzva. Meforshim explain that the main motive for the mitzva is to engender friendship and brotherhood among Bnai Yisroel. Others maintain that it is to counter Haman’s critical statement describing the Jewish people as “one nation dispersed and divided {among the nations)” (Esther 3: 8). Another understanding is given by Terumas HaDeshen (111) who writes that the reason for this mitzva is to assure that everyone should be able to eat a proper, seuda or festive meal on Purim.
Given the above Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that there are different factors and variables that may be at play in your case. It may depend on both the nature of the person receiving the gift and the person giving it. Most important is that common sense should rule, so that a mitzva that was established for promoting peace and friendship, should not turn into the opposite by becoming an insult.
The Rov suggested that a middle priced wine bottle and some appetizing and properly presented baked goods or sweets are usually well accepted by all.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a.
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