Here are some steps for helping a child change her inappropriate behavior: 1) for your own clarity, write down the inappropriate behavior and what triggers it. For example, "When child doesn't get what she wants, she has a meltdown." 2) write down the TARGET (desired) behavior for that trigger. For example: "When she doesn't get what she wants, child says "I'm not happy" and walks away." 3) In a calm moment, teach child the target behavior and have her practice it. 4) give positive attention (acknowledgment and/or praise) to the child when she uses the target behavior when the trigger occurs (i.e. she didn't get what she wanted). If she "forgets" to use the target behavior, have her practice it as soon as her meltdown has ended - and then immediately give her plenty of praise.
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