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Blog Image: Tehillim[1].jpg
Tehillim Thoughts - 24th of Ellul, September 24, 2008
"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my G-D. Let Your spirit, which is good, lead me on level land (Psalm 143:10)." David asks of G-D that He facilitate their relationship. It is David’s commitment to Hashem, his acceptance of Hashem’s dominion, which prompts him to request personal instruction from Hashem. David seeks to learn all of G-D’s commandments so that he may fulfill them. Furthermore, he asks that Hashem, who is good and seeks to better man, lead him on the correct road. The path he seeks is the path of Hashem’s commandments, the straight and level path. The Da’at Mikra comments that David is asking that Hashem, in His love, kindness and compassion, lead him through level land that is easily traveled, not along a rocky and dangerous road. David seeks a path free of his enemies. It is David’s intense desire to better serve Hashem and carry out His will that is his motivation in seeking a safer and easier path through life.
 
Copyright, 2008 Rachel Lerner


Posted 9/25/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Tehillim | Comments (0)


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Rav Wolbe Z"L on Rosh Hashana
The Ramban in his introduction to the story of Akeidos Yitzchok (Bereishis 22, 1) explains the purpose of a nisoyon. A person is tested for his own benefit: so that he can be rewarded for a good deed and not merely a good heart. Though Avraham Avinu succeeded in purifying his heart to the nth degree, nevertheless, this greatness remained merely potential (b’koach). The ten nisyonos with which Avraham was tested, were a means of turning his greatness from potential into concrete actions (b’po’el), because the ultimate objective is perfecting one’s actions.
 
Rav Wolbe (Ma’amerei Yemei Ratzon pg. 97) writes, with this in mind let us try to understand the Mishna in Pirkei Avos (2, 13). R’ Yochanan ben Zakkai asks his disciples to, "Seek out the proper path to which a man should cling." They returned with various answers – a good eye, a good friend, a good neighbor, one who considers the outcome of his deeds and a good heart. Said R’ Yochanan ben Zakkai, "I prefer the words of R’ Elazar (who chose a good heart), for your words are included in his words."
 
The other four responses all focused on tangible actions and a practical way of life (b’po’el). A good eye rids one of much evil. He judges others favorably and he is cleansed from hatred and jealousy. A good friend will perform kindness, share in another’s grief, forgive and forget and many other positive middos. A good neighbor surpasses a good friend, for he contains all those qualities and, moreover, he acts beneficially to even those who are not his closest confidantes. Someone who considers the outcome of his actions fears Hashem, and his every action is made with an acute awareness of its ramifications. If so, in what aspect does a good heart, which represents potential (b’koach), supersede all these other positive qualities?
 
Rav Wolbe explains that a good heart is the best preparation for life, because it encompasses all good actions. The actions are the most important aspect of one’s avodah, and they properly portray the goodness of the heart of one who is performing those actions. A lack of an ability to perform reflects a flaw in the "goodness" of the heart. He who truly possesses a good heart will in time come to be a person who possesses a good eye, is a good friend and neighbor, and one who considers the actions of his deeds. Because Avraham possessed a good heart, he had the ability to pass all ten nisyonos with which he was tested.
 
Rosh Hashana is the day on which we are supposed to accept upon ourselves the yoke of Heavenly Kingship. Accepting this yoke is akin to possessing the good heart mentioned in the Mishna: it is a general concept that encompasses all aspects of our lives. However, just like a good heart, accepting the yoke of Heaven cannot remain only b’koach – it must translate into actions. We must make an effort to focus on Hashem’s loftiness, His Kingship and the great advantage gained by accepting this yoke upon oneself. However, it can’t end there. This knowledge must translate into actions, and the b’po’el of accepting the yoke of Heaven is fine tuning our middos to act solely in accordance with the will of Hashem.
 
We must not try to be someone we are not. In each person’s specific situation - with his friends and family, his house and necessities – he must make an effort to act in accordance with the will of Hashem. Our actions after Rosh Hashana will mirror the extent to which we accepted the yoke of Hashem. May we all merit a Kesiva V’Chasima Tova!
 
This dvar Torah was compiled by the family of the Mashgiach Harav Shlomo ben R’ Moshe z"l, l’iluy nishmaso.


Posted 9/25/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Thoughts for the Week | Comments (0)


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Shmirat Halashon for Friday 09/19/2008 - Rchilut Continued
Please Say/Whisper the Words Out Loud

Lesson 1

Rchilut is not allowed even if all the details of your narration are true. E.g. "but i heard it myself. That’s exactly what s/he said about you".

Lesson 2
The most serious type of rchilut is the type that causes two people who have been close friends to dislike each other.

---
Rchilut = Reporting to others what someone has done or spoken against them.


Posted 9/22/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


Blog Image: Tehillim[1].jpg
Tehillim Thought of the Day [Psalm 72:12-15]
21st of Ellul, September 21, 2008  

David promises his son, Solomon, that he shall receive tribute from the nations and their monarchs.  What is responsible for this homage?  "For he will deliver the defenseless man who cries, and the poor who has no helper.  He will care for those that have been brought low and for the defenseless, and he will save the souls of the defenseless.  He will redeem their soul from malice and violence, and their blood will be precious in his sight.  He will live, and he will give him of the gold of Sheba, and he will pray for him continually and bless him every day (Psalm 72:12-15)."  It is Solomon's concern for the needy and most vulnerable that will earn him tribute and respect.  He is the defender of the defenseless and the caretaker of the poor.  Those who are disenfranchised and disempowered will find an ally in him.  He will attend to their physical, material and spiritual needs.  The defenseless, who are easy prey, will be protected and their blood precious in his eyes.  Solomon's kingship will be characterized by the care and concern lavished upon his subjects.  The gold that is brought to him in tribute shall be used to maintain the lives of his people.  The poor man shall live through him and his largesse and in return shall bless and pray for his king daily.   It is the moral greatness that will distinguish Solomon and his reign, not his physical and material might.  

Copyright, 2008 Rachel Lerner


Posted 9/22/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Tehillim | Comments (1)


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Shmirat Halashon please print off for Shabbat 09/20/2008 - Liiluy Nishmat - Blima bas Binyomin - Rch
Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1

If two people were mortal enemies before you said anything, you are still not allowed ti tell one what the other has spoken against them.

Lesson 2
Rchilut is not allowed both in instances when you volunteer the information on your own, and in cases when someone pressures you into doing i. ex. "cmon just tell me what he said".


Posted 9/22/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


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Shmirat Halashon - 09/21/2008
Please Say/Whisper the Words Out Loud

Lesson 1:  Lashon Hora without mentioning names is still considered lashon hora if the listener will be able to figure out the identity of the person.

Lesson 2:  Any statement, even if not derogatory, that might ultimately cause financial loss, physical pain, mental anguish, or any damage is lashon hara.


Posted 9/22/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


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Shmiras Halashon 09/16/2008

Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1

The definition of rchilut is: Reporting to someone what others have done or spoken against them.
e.g. Mr X told me that you are dishonest". or Mrs. A. tried to have you expelled from school.

Lesson 2
If the information is necessary for a constructive purpose, it is permissible to relate rchilut when those specified conditions are met.



Posted 9/18/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


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Shmirat Halashon 09/17/2008 - Rchilut continued - For the speedy safety and freedom of Yakov Yosef b
Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud
 
Lesson 1
The torah prohibition of Rchilut comes from the phrase "Do not go out as a talebearer among your people" (Vayikra 19:16).
 
Lesson 2
When a person sends a telegram, s/he weighs every word. Same should be for how we speak


Posted 9/18/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


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Shmirat Halashon 09/10/2008 - Repeating Lashon Hora Spoken in Presence of 3 people

Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1 - Recap

Although there’s the opinion that it’s okay to repeat lashon hora spoken in the presence of 3 or more people, it is not widely accepted. However, even if this lenient opinion is accepted, there are many conditions that restrict its applicability.

Lesson 2 - Qualifications for repeating information spoken about in front of 3 people
A.
Even if lashon hora was told in the presence of 3 people, it is forbidden to be spread purposefully. The lenient opinion only allows the information to be INCIDENTALLY repeated, without any intent to publicize it. (to be continued)

** Note - Some people have been getting this email for quite a long time and may find it boring or repetitive. Some have requested different daily lessons and I am starting a daily lesson that’s more hassidic in nature. If you would like to stop receiving the shmirat halashon emails, switch to the others, or join both, please let me know! Thank you for your continued learning
- Ora



Posted 9/16/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


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Hilchos Shabbos - Please print off to review on Shabbos Sept 13

We continue with our Erev Shabbos-Hilchos Shabbos Series:

 

1.    Our custom is to treat a Dovor Gush (a solid food item which is 110 degrees and above) with all of the restrictions of a Kli Rishon for most practical purposes--even if it is in a Kli Shlishi.  Therefore, one may not sprinkle garlic, celery, diced onion, or any previously uncooked spices and seasoning directly onto a hot Dovor Gush, just as one may not put these items into a Kli Rishon.  (The 39 Melochos of Shabbos by Rabbi Dovid Ribiat, Shlita, p. 583)

 

2.    It is permitted to wash dishes using hot water that was heated before Shabbos.  However, care must be taken not to pour the hot water directly onto the dirty dishes, as this can cause bishul of the food residue left on the dishes.  The correct procedure is to first pour the hot kettle water into a large cup or container (i.e., a Kli Sheni), and then to transfer this hot water into an empty wash basin.  The dishes may then be put into the basin, which is now a Kli Shlishi.  Liquid Shabbos soap may then be added.  Note that dishes may only be washed on Shabbos if needed later on Shabbos (ibid., 641-642).

 

3.    If the hot water faucet was accidentally turned on (or left running) on Shabbos, there may be a problem with turning it off, as shutting the faucet may cause cold water remaining in the tank to become hot and cook.  If one is uncertain as to how his hot water/heating system works, or how his cold water is being heated, he may apprise a non-Jew of the problem in the hope that he will understand on his own that his services are needed to shut the water (if possible, the Non-Jew should not be instructed directly to shut the water) (ibid.).



Posted 9/16/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Hilchos Shabbos | Comments (0)


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Shmirat Halashon 09/11/2008 - Repeating Lashon Hora Spoken in Presence of 3 people -contd.

Please Say/Whisper the Words Out Loud

Lesson 1 - 2nd condition for repeating...

B. The special (and lenient) category of repeating LH spoken in the presence of 3 people applies ONLY to someone who has her/himself heard it in the presence of 3 people. If it was heard with less than 3 people, or even if the speak assures you that s/he initially said it in front of 3 people, you CANNOT repeat it.

Lesson 2 - 3d condition for repeating

If any of the 3 listeners is the type of person who guards their speech and will not repeat the lashon hora, it is forbidden for the others to repeat it. The same is true if one of the 3 is a relative or close friend of the person spoken about. In these cases, they won’t repeat it, so itts like it was only said in front of 2.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(In case you missed the last 2 related lessons -  Recap from before.
Although there’s the opinion that it’s okay to repeat lashon hora spoken in the presence of 3 or more people, it is not widely accepted. However, even if this lenient opinion is accepted, there are many conditions that restrict its applicability.

Qualifications for repeating information spoken about in front of 3 people
A.
Even if lashon hora was told in the presence of 3 people, it is forbidden to be spread purposefully. The lenient opinion only allows the information to be INCIDENTALLY repeated, without any intent to publicize it. (to be continued)

** Note - Some people have been getting this email for quite a long time and may find it boring or repetitive. Some have requested different daily lessons and I am starting a daily lesson that’s more hassidic in nature. If you would like to stop receiving the shmirat halashon emails, switch to the others, or join both, please let me know! Thank you for your continued learning

---
These lessons are taken directly from Guard Your Tongue by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin - Adapted from the teachings of the Chafetz Chaim

 



Posted 9/16/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


Blog Image: ChofetzChaim2.jpg
Daily Shemiras Halashon Monday September 15

Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1
Don’t repeat lashon hora that is common knowledge. If you look at all the conditions necessary to allow the repetition of this information, you will find that the lenient opinion is only applicable in extremely rare cases. Furthermore, even if all the conditions are met, the chafetz chaim was not resolved whether we can rely on this position.

Lesson 2 - recap of all the conditions
a. the repetition of the information cannot be purposeful, only if was incidental
b. 3 people had to have been present, you cant just assume they wee
c. if one of the 3 are the type who don’t repeat lashon hora, you cannot count it as three people
d. only if it is repeated in the city it was originally heard in
e. If the initial speaker indicated s/he doesn’t want the info spread, all bets are off
f. has to be one person relating it to three (not any other numbers or categories)
g. you cannot believe what is repeated at face value
h. you cannot add to the narrative
i. you cannot repeat well known information about past misdeeds if they don’t do it anymore

 



Posted 9/16/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


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Shmirat Halashon - For Shabbat 09/13/2008 - Please Print - Repeating LH said in front of 3 people -

Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1
- condition 6
This lenient category - applies only very specifically when it is 1 person relating the LH to 3 People.

Lesson 2
- condition 7
The 3 people who have heard the LH together are not permitted to accept it as the absolute truth. Additionally, they are not to relate t to anyone else who will accept it as truth.



Posted 9/16/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


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Shmirat Halashon 09/12/2008- For Friday - Repeating lashon hora said in front of 3 people cont'd

Please Say/ Whisper the Words Out Loud

Lesson 1- 4th Condition
The lenient opinion (allowing one to repeat this information) only permits the lashon hora to be repeated in the city where it was originally heard, since there it would be spread by the 3 people who have heard it. (If the city where the LH was spoken initially is very large, this cannot be applied).

Lesson 2 - 5th condition
If the person who originally related the lashon hora in the presence of 3 indicated in any manner taht s/he does not want the info spread any further, the listeners are forbidden to repeat the LH to anyone else since chances are at least 1 listener will obey the speakers request.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(In case you missed the last related lessons -  Recap from before.
Although there’s the opinion that it’s okay to repeat lashon hora spoken in the presence of 3 or more people, it is not widely accepted. However, even if this lenient opinion is accepted, there are many conditions that restrict its applicability.

Qualifications for repeating information spoken about in front of 3 people
A.
Even if lashon hora was told in the presence of 3 people, it is forbidden to be spread purposefully. The lenient opinion only allows the information to be INCIDENTALLY repeated, without any intent to publicize it. (to be continued)

B. The special (and lenient) category of repeating LH spoken in the presence of 3 people applies ONLY to someone who has her/himself heard it in the presence of 3 people. If it was heard with less than 3 people, or even if the speak assures you that s/he initially said it in front of 3 people, you CANNOT repeat it.

C. If any of the 3 listeners is the type of person who guards their speech and will not repeat the lashon hora, it is forbidden for the others to repeat it. The same is true if one of the 3 is a relative or close friend of the person spoken about. In these cases, they won’t repeat it, so itts like it was only said in front of 2.

** Note - Some people have been getting this email for quite a long time and may find it boring or repetitive. Some have requested different daily lessons and I am starting a daily lesson that’s more hassidic in nature. If you would like to stop receiving the shmirat halashon emails, switch to the others, or join both, please let me know! Thank you for your continued learning

---
These lessons are taken directly from Guard Your Tongue by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin - Adapted from the teachings of the Chafetz Chaim



Posted 9/16/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


Blog Image: ChofetzChaim2.jpg
Daily Shemiras Halashon 09/04/08
Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud
Lesson 1
If you are in a position where you have to wake people up in the morning, Do not make any derogatory comments like "get up lazy bones" or "if you don't get up now, you are proving that you never get anything done...". Rather, use encouraging comments that motivate people. People who look forward to a bright day and tell themselves they will be able to accomplish a lot, find it much easier to wake up with enthusiasm.

Lesson 2
If someone does something that wastes your money, i.e. throwing out food that could still be eaten, do not speak in a manner that would be onaas devarim. Especially when the loss is minimal, badgering someone about inconsequential matters creates resentment and animosity. The loss of peace of mind and tranquility is much greater than the loss of money.


Posted 9/8/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


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Daily Hilchos Shemiras Halashon 09/05/08
Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1
If you want someone who is making a lot of noise to be quiet or to listen to what you have to say, word your request in a polite manner. The expression "Shut Up" is demeaning and usually onaas dvorim (verbal abuse).

Lesson 2

When telling someone to be quiet instead of,  "you are a blabber-mouth, you talk and talk and don’t let anyone say anything. Whats wrong with you" or "will you shut up already", try positive approaches that show respect and give the person incentive to listen to what you have to say e.g. "I need to concentrate right now, I would greatly appreciate if you could dbe quiet" or "I’d like to express my opinion, let me have a chance, then i can continue hearing what you have to say".


Posted 9/8/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


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Daily Halachos on Shemiras Halashon - please print off for Shabbos 09/06/08
Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud

Lesson 1
There is an opinion that if someone spoke lashon hora in the presence of 3 or more people and they subsequently repeat this information, they are not guilty of speaking lashon hora. The reasoning is that when as many as 3 people are aware of something, we assume that it definitely will be spread, and according to this opinion, something that will become common knowledge is not prohibited as lashon hora.

Lesson 2 - continued from above
NOTE - that is a lenient opinion and isnt accepted with most authorities. Even when its accepted (that you can repeat info said in the presence of 3 or more people), there are numerous qualifications that restrict its applicability. Even if all the conditions are met, which is extrmeeley rare, the Chofetz chaim remains in doubt as to whether this opinion can be relied upon. To be continued.


Posted 9/8/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


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Daily Hilchos Shmirat Halashon - Wednesday September 3
Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud
 
Lesson 1 : "Maybe this is too hard for you". At first glance, this can sound helpful. But it may be a subtle way of insulting someone. Why was it necessary to add "for you"? Such statements depend on your intention and on the way the listener will respond.
 
Lesson 2 :  We are not allowed to do or say things to scare others. This includes giving people false information as a joke, such as telling them their house burnt down or that someone was in an accident.


Posted 9/4/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


Blog Image: ChofetzChaim2.jpg
Daily Shemiras Halashon Monday September 1
Please Say/Whisper the Words out Loud
 
Lesson 1 : Q. Are we allowed to speak lashon hora to Hashem/God - for ex. if you want to vent or mentally work out a problem with someone else.
 
A. Surprizingly, NO. If we need to work out a problem, we need to speak to a trustworthy objective, third party person who can actually help us work it out. When we speak to Hashem about these kind of problems, we are venting to God Lashon hora, and that has no function other than tattletaling. Even though it may make us feel better at the time, it is not okay to complain to Gd about others.
 
Lesson 2 :  Q. If we know someone is about to do something really wrong, are we allowed to tell them lashon hora to prevent them from doing that. For ex. If you know a guy is about to date a woman who you know is married (and is not saying that important fact). A. Yes! You would be obligated to say something (Carefully, constructively, and if you know it for a fact).


Posted 9/2/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Shemiras Halashon | Comments (0)


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Tehillim Thoughts - 30th of Av, August 31, 2008

"Remember how short my lifetime is; for what falseness have You created all the sons of man (Psalm 89:48)?"    The psalmist alludes to two recurrent themes in our lives.  As we age, we have a growing sense of the brevity of our lives.   At the same time, we wonder why we have been created when so much of the human experience seems purposeless and meaningless.    But it is precisely the juxtaposition of these two ideas that give hope and meaning.  If one considers the very shortness of life, one feels compelled to invest one’s life with meaning.   If time is short, we must make every moment count.   It is in the struggle for meaning that man actualizes his creation.   He matters because he chooses to live with purpose, following the laws of the Torah.  It is not up to Hashem to impute meaning and worth to our lives; it is our task to identify and then embody the values that truly matter.   The psalmist acknowledges the difficulty of this task and asks Hashem to remember that his time is short.   To fulfill his purpose, the psalmist will need Hashem’s guidance and direction, and he does not hesitate to ask for it.   Hashem’s Truth will remove the sense of falseness that he feels.

 

Copyright, Rachel Lerner 2008



Posted 9/1/2008 12:00 AM | Tell a Friend | Tehillim | Comments (0)



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