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# 3837 Happy or Not?
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Q. One that has the family tradition to fast on the day of the Yohrzait of a dear one. If the first Yohrzait day is this coming Friday 'Tu Beav'; Does he fast?
If he does not, is it proper to make a Siyum and a Seuda?
A. Mishna Berura (573: 7) quotes Magen Avrohom who rules that usually in a day when no Tachanun is recited, one does not fast either, and it includes Tu B'av.
There is a minhag by some to make a Seuda during Tu B'av (Karlin Beis Aharon and others. See Nitei Gavriel 98: 7).
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav
Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/11/2022 10:29 PM |
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# 3836 Between Life and Death
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Q. There is a tradition in our family to invite our deceased grandfathers to weddings and other S'machot by placing an invitation to the occasion at the Matzeva, usually in the container where the candles are lit. A member of our visiting relatives wants to place an invitation to their wedding during Shabbat as that is the only day she can do it. Is it permissible?
A. The above should be avoided for two reasons, Firstly. as addressed on question 3739 on visiting Kevarim on Erev Shabbos or during Shabbos we wrote: "On Erev Shabbos the answer is that it is permitted, however on Shabbos and Yom Tov it is not.
The Arizal (Shaar Hayichudim) argues that on Shabbos the Neshomos of the Tzadikim are not in contact with their earthly abode.
Mishmeres Sholom (5: 29), Nitei Gavriel (Avelus 83: 2) and others permit to visit Kever Avos (burial ground of forefathers) and Tzadikim to pray for someone who is in life danger, during Shabbos or Yom Tov."
Our Rabbonim pointed out that additionally it is prohibited since one will be carrying an object (the invitation) where there is no valid Eruv.
Even if there is an Eruv in the city, the cemetery with its protective fence stand as a separate entity, where you cannot carry during Shabbos.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav
Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/11/2022 10:28 PM |
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# 3835 Get a Good Name
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Q. I lead a group that is building a new shul and of course most of the work involved is raising the funds needed. From experience we know that it is easier to get contributions when a name is given to an important article to be acquired, such as the Aron Hakodesh, Bimah etc. Is it correct to try to attach a donors name to other common items such as rows of seats, shtenders and even carpets?
A. Horav Dovid Pam Shlit'a maintains that it is propitious to attach donors names to all items contributed. The source is the Remah (Y.D. H. Tzedaka)
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/9/2022 3:28 PM |
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# 3834 Draw the Curtain
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Q. There was a disagreement in our shul as to when to put back the Poroches (curtain in front of the Aron Hakodesh) that is removed during Tisha Beav. Is it after Chatzos (midday) or at the time one begins Maariv. What is correct.
A. There are different traditions. Some maintain that it is replaced after Chatzos or for Mincha. (Mishulchan Avoseinu p. 273, Nessivos Hamarav - Morocan Traditions p. 213 and others). Others replace it for Maariv at the end of the Taanis, as is the minhag of the Toronto Kolel and many other congregations.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav
Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/9/2022 11:31 AM |
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# 3833 A Fast Break?
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Q. Dear Rabbi: If someone had to take pills with some water during Tisha Beav as permitted by Halacha due to his medical condition, is he still considered as fasting and can still recite Anenu or get an Aliya LaTorah?
A. Mishna Berura (568: 5) rules that if one drank less than a Meloh Lugmav (or one cheekful) he is still considered as fasting and has to complete the Taanis.
A Meloh Lugmav is often referred to as Rov Revi’is or the majority of a Revi'is (about 1.27 fl. oz. or 38 ml lechumra).
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav
Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/9/2022 11:26 AM |
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# 3832 Drinks on the House
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Q. At the end of the fast of Tisha Beav that this year will be delayed until Sunday, before one makes Havdala can one drink some soda water when very thirsty, if that is all what is available in Shul?
A. Shulchan Aruch (299: 1) rules that one may drink water before reciting Havdalah at the end of Shabbos.
However, Poskim debate if that permission applies to sparkling soda water that one drinks reciting a brocho, even when not thirsty, because of the pleasantness and good flavor it has. (Shevet Hakehosi 2: 124). Other Poskim are lenient (See Piskei Teshuvos ibid. quoting Shalmas Chaim 273).
Horav Dovid Pam and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a maintain that when possible one should be stringent, and just drink tap water.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav
Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/9/2022 11:20 AM |
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# 3831 Sing to a Different Tune?
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Q. I usually sing during Shacharis the Shirah of Oz Yashir with great joy as mentioned in Halacha. Is that correct also on Tisha Beav?
A. On question 135 regarding reciting the Shira with joy during a time of Aveilus, we wrote: "Zohar (B’shalach and Terumah) and Midrash, quoted by many Poiskim, exalt the ones who recite Shiras Hayam with great joy, with detailed care, and with its cantillations. They are considered as if they experienced themselves the Exodus of Mitzraim and Hashem saves them and forgives all their sins. (Pri Chodosh, Mishna Berura 53, et. al.)
Because of the inherent requirement to recite the Shira with happiness, some Poiskim advise to refrain from saying it in a mourner’s house or on the 9 of Av (Tur O.C. 559, Bais Yosef and Darchei Moshe ibid.). However, the accepted tradition is to say it including when the avel himself leads.
Meiri (Taanis 31,a) after quoting the view of the ones who don’t recite Shiras Hayam, writes that he does not see any benefit in their opinion. Since all agree that the psalms of Pesukey Dezimra are said, similarly other terms of praise, inspiration and awakening for Tefilah can be equally recited.
Halacha (O.C. 223,3), states that two contradicting blessings, Sheheyanu, said in joy and Dayan Emes, said in mourning could be recited in the same occasion, as when a father dies and the son inherits his estate. We find a similar Medresh on Akeidas Ytzchok (Bereishis 22,11) that relates how tears were flowing from Avrohom Ovinus eyes, yet he performed the Akeida and followed Hashem’s decree with great happiness. An analogous aphorism in the Talmud (Brochos 54a) states, that one should bless Hashem for the dreadful things in life as he blesses for the good ones. The Talmud explains that it refers to accepting them all with joy. It is obvious that a person who is in mourning can still maintain a degree of joy in his hearth.
Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a explained that a person may be in joy for having had Yetziat Mitzraim in the past and be expecting, with joy too, the future redemption, yet he may be now in a sate of temporary mourning."
The same applies, as mentioned to Tisha Beav.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/9/2022 11:06 AM |
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# 3830 Learning about Learning
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Q. Someone who delivers a Daf Hayomi and in this year it will be on Sunday. Since usually he group learns two dafim on Sunday (Shabbos and Sunday dafim), it will be tough later on to catch up.
Is there a 'Heter' (permission) to learn the dafim on Tisha Beav, but including with them how they would apply in cases of Avelus or mourning?
A. Horav Dovid Pam Shlit'a stressed that learning the Halochos of Avelus or mourning although permitted during Tisha Beav, (Shulchan Aruch O.H. 551: 2) should not be used to permit other non related Torah learning. Only Torah material that relates directly to Avelus or the Churban of the Beis Hamikdash is permitted. See Piskei Halochos 554: 4 n. 16.
However Horav Kalman Ochs Shlit'a pointed out that some Chassidic congregations learn the Daf after Chatzos (midday).
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/4/2022 10:43 PM |
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# 3829 Ready to Wear?
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Q. Dear Rov. I have a new pair of tennis shoes that I bought some months ago, but never used, (the old ones had to be discarded). Can I use them during Tisha Beav? Is it better to put them on during the Nine Days so they will not be new for Tisha Beav, or it does not matter since as is, new clothes are also no to be used during the Nine days. What is correct?
A. Kovetz Halochos and other Poskim rule that it is permitted when needed to wear new tennis shoes or similar permitted footwear, during Tisha Beav itself.
In our case, Horav Yaakov Hirschman, Horav Dovid Pam and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a are ot the opinion that it is better to wear them first on the days before Shabbos Chazon.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/4/2022 10:41 PM |
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# 3828 A Hard Pill to Swallow
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Q. Kvod Harav. One that is permitted to take his necessary pills in Tisha Beav before he goes to bed. In a regular year he takes them before the Taanis begins. What should he do this year. He usually avoids taking them on Shabbat and waits until Motze Shabbat. So this year what is better, taking them on Shabbat or on Tisha Beav Motze Shabbat?
A. One may argue that it is better to delay an act that may be prohibited as much as possible and take the pills after the end of Shabbos on Tisha Beav.
There is an additional possibility of taking the pills on this particular occasion after the Shekia during Bein Hashmosos, a time of doubt whether it belongs to Shabbos or Tisha Beav.
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that it is better to take them during Shabbos. Horav Yaakov Hirschman Shlit'a is similar.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/4/2022 10:40 PM |
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# 3827 Never Too Late?
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Q. Re- question above on the Tikun (meal) offered in our Shul after the end of Tisha Beav. Since on this year that Tisha Beav was on Sunday, there will be no Melave Malka at the end of Shabbos, is it then correct to wash at that Tikun and consider it to be a late Melave Malka?
A. On a similar question (3250) we wrote: “Shaarei Teshuva (O.H. 30: 1) writes that the Neshama Yiseira (extra holy soul) granted to us at the beginning of Shabbos, stays with us after Shabbos ends, only until Chatzos or the midnight on Motzei Shabbos, so the seuda or meal celebrated to honour of the departure of that most elevated day should be observed until before midnight. Mishna Berura (ibid. 2) mentions that this should be eaten as soon as possible after the end of Shabbos.
Chashukei Chemed (Pesachim 102b) deliberates when one only gets the wine necessary for reciting Havdalah after midnight, if he should wait until after Chatzos and eat then Melave Malka only after saying Havdalah or follow the opinion of Shaarei Teshuva and not eat that seuda after midnight. However, Oisrei Lagefen (p. 551) maintains that if one has not fallen asleep yet, one can eat Melave Malka even after Chatzos. Beis Yisroel Hasholem (p. 200) mentions that the Kristirer Rebeh would celebrate Melave Malka until three hours after Chatzos.
Zemiros Leshabbos (p. 183) quotes that the Divrei Chaim once told his grandson Rabbi Shlomo Halberstam, the first Bobover Rebbe, to follow the Rofshitzer Rebbe's minhag (also his grandson's forefather), who would not eat Melave Malka on Motzei Shabbos, because he just could not cope with the departure of the Shabbos Kodesh, so he rather ate that seuda after davening on Sunday.”
It is mentioned in Chassidic sefarim that some Rebbes would make a Seudas Melave Malka on Tuesday also (Zemiros Shabbos Sholom Umevorach p.157).
Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is to follow the opinion of the Mishna Berura and there is no place for a Melave Malka on Sunday night.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/4/2022 10:38 PM |
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# 3826 United in Havdalah?
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Q. At the end of the fast of Tisha Beav, there is a Tikun offered in shul and Havdalah is said first before eating. The women at home don't want to keep on fasting until their husband returns. Can they make Havdalah for themselves?
A. On question 847 regarding a woman that can't fast, if her husband says Havdala for her during the day, and she drinks the cup, we wrote:. "Poskim rule that an ill person who has to eat on Tisha Beav (on Sunday) should recite Havdala before he eats.(Knesses Hagedola 71, Shaarei Teshuva 556:1) In Regard to women who have to eat Poskim disagree. Some maintain that they may wait to hear it at the end of the fast. (Nitey Gavriel – H. Ben Hametzorim 2; 95; 6, quoting also Orchos Rabenu).
Mishne Halochos (7: 39) maintains that it is better on the onset that the husband should recite Havdala for her and give a minor to drink the grape juice.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit”a opinion is that, she should recite Havdala for herself."
Similarly, in our case she can recite Havdalah for herself. See also question 3273 where we mention the Rov's Shlit’a opinion that women on this occasion should daven Maariv at the end of Shabbos (not necessarily in shul) so they can recite Havdalah when saying Shemone Essre, and be permitted to do work, since we do not recite the usual Havdalah until the end of the Taanis, Sunday night.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/4/2022 10:35 PM |
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# 3825 The Wet Towel?
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Q. Can one during the great heat of summer, on the Nine Days sit outside in the backyard while being covered with a very wet dripping towel?
A. It stands to reason that it is permitted since even if considered similar to a bath, it is only partial, cold and needed to protect oneself from the heat.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/4/2022 10:28 PM |
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# 3824 Drop the Other Shoes
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Q. Someone forgot to clean and shine his Shabbos shoes before the Nine Days. What is preferred for Shabbos use, to wear ones weekday shoes that are actually clean or the soiled Shabbos Shoes?
A. Actually Poskim permit polishing shoes during the Nine Days. (Nitei Gavriel 27:4 and others).
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/4/2022 10:26 PM |
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# 3823 No Vertical Bath
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Q. Dear Rabbi: During the heat of the summer days our small children play in the backyard around some water sprinklers to keep cool and enjoy themselves. Is there a problem if their parent play with them to keep them safe, but also get wet during the Nine Days?
Thanks for an early reply.
A. Poskim permit young children to get wet outside during the Nine Days. (Kovetz Halochos 14: 3, and others).
It stands to reason that the ones taking care of them in need can also get wet.
(See question 1736 regarding working as a baby swim instructor during the Nine Days).
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/4/2022 10:24 PM |
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# 3822 Above Suspicion
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Q. We have a well attended Kiruv Torah Shiur once a week. Part of the success of the group possibly is due to the delicious food served. During the summer we often make a very attractive BBQ.
Can we during the Nine Days offer Delicious OU certified veggie- burgers that taste, look and smell like real meat burgers? Is there a problem of Marit Ayin or prohibited because it may seem to observers to be in violation of Jewish law, even when in reality it is fully permissible?
A. One may place a broad noticeable sign by the BBQ that the broiled food is Pareve. Our Rabbonim questioned that the spreading smell may be problematic for neighbours or the passerby that may not see the sign but will feel the smell. However, since it is a Torah Shiur with open Sefarim, they can assume that there is a permitted Siyum taking place
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/4/2022 10:23 PM |
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# 3821 Dancing by the Moonlight?
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Q. Is it better to wait until after Tisha Beav for saying Kiddush Levana? Is it permitted then immediately?
A. Remah (O.H. 426: 2) rules that Kiddush Levana should be recited after Tisha Beav. On question 2499 in regards to dancing on Kidush Levana on Motzei Tisha B’Av mentions that since the Remo considers the dancing a mitzvah it should be permitted even in the state of Avelus still present at the end of the fast. The dance is done to foster our belief in the Geula, since in Tisha B’av the Messiah was born. He adds that this is the common accepted tradition.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/4/2022 10:21 PM |
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# 3820 A Flower of a Shailah
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Q. Recently you quoted question 3260 regarding one that buys flowers for home every Friday Lik’vod (in honor of) Shabbos, if he should also do so for Shabbos Chazon, (Shabbos before Tisha Beav), and mentioned that "Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a opinion is that although it is not exactly the same as planting new flowers, it is still better to avoid even just buying them on Shabbos Chazon.” Is this true even if you buy them every Shabbos?
A. It is what Horav Shlomo Miller's Shlit'a mentioned. (See Piskei Teshuvos 551: 4: n. 39)
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 8/4/2022 10:19 PM |
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# 3819 Going Home
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Q. Someone who is driving on the field roads for the day just to get away from home, does he have to say Tefilas Haderech? After all it is mentioned in it: 'Vesagienu Limechoz Cheftzeinu' or make us reach the desired location, and in this case it is just going away from home.
A. Horav Dovid Pam and Horav Aharon Miller Shlit'a maintain that Tefilas Haderech should be recited if the distances meet the requirements for the Tefila, since after all he is planing to return home and that qualifies as reaching the desired location.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 7/31/2022 2:31 PM |
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# 3818 Wig In?
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Q. A woman that has a few shaitels (wigs) she washes every week, can she use a washed shaitel for Shabbos Chazon?
On question 201 regarding if one can wear a freshly washed Sheitel during the nine days, if its not a new wig; we wrote "Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a ruled that you can use a freshly washed and set wig for Shabbos Chazon, even if it coincides with Tisha B’av." Although one is not allowed to wash a Sheitel during the Nine Days, when it is washed frequently, it is considered similar to a washed shirt that one can use for Shabbos during the Nine Days.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit'a.
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Posted 7/28/2022 10:47 PM |
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Important Numbers
