QUESTION:
If I don't have a son or a grandson, how can I ensure the continuation of my family?
ANSWER:
You can ensure the continuation of the wider family, and that's the Jewish nation, because we're all blood kin. You have cousins, and it's important that they should continue, and by working for a yeshiva you're ensuring the continuation of your family. By working for a Beth Jacob school that takes in girls and teaches them to be proud, and teaches them how to be good Jewish daughters, and then good Jewish women, good Jewish mothers and have big families, you're doing the best that you can right now in your circumstance. Of course if you're capable of having your own, you surely should be happy at the opportunity.
Everybody can participate in the big job of perpetuating the Jewish nation, and that's Torah education, not what they call education. Yeshivas, Bais Yaakovs, real frum Torah institutions - if you'll help them, raise money for them, induce boys and girls to go there, that's the way you'll ensure the continuation of your family.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
If one is trying to do something, and many obstacles come to stand in his way, how does he know that it is the Satan, or maybe it's a signal from Heaven that he should stop?
ANSWER:
Let him ask advice, because many times people think they are doing good things and it's the opposite of good. Ask counsel, and if somebody tells you it's good, somebody who is capable tells you it's good, then the obstacle is only a test. It makes you give a higher jump to get over it, that's all, you'll get more reward.
In general shomeia l'eitza chochom (Mishlei 12:15), a person who listens to good advice is a wise man. Good advice does not mean a marriage counselor. It does not mean a psychologist or psychiatrist; keep away from them like you keep away from a rattlesnake, unless he is a very frum Jew, because they have ruined a tremendous amount of people.
Look for somebody! If the Lubavitcher Rebbe will let you talk to him, if Rav Yaakov Kaminetzky will let you talk to him, if gedolei yisroel will let you take counsel of them, then prize them and utilize the opportunity. If lesser people are available then use them, but it's important.
Most people don't use this advice at all that I am giving, they never take counsel of Torah sages, because they think that they are capable of handling their own affairs. nobody is! Even the Torah sage should take counsel of somebody else. Rav Elchonon Wasserman always took counsel of the Chofetz Chaim or Reb Chaim Brisker. Even though he was well on in years he continued to take counsel of the great men.
This is a big error that Orthodox Jews today commit; there are some people today that don't even belong to a synagogue, they travel around Shabbos morning. They load their tallis underneath their coat and they are off for adventures to a new synagogue. And so you don't know anytalmid chochom, at least a local rabbi, a local rebbe, somebody, you have no connection.
A woman calls me up, she has trouble with her husband, he's getting off the derech hayoshor, he needs counsel, she's from Boro Park. I ask where does he daven? He davens in ten different places. That's a great pity; he has nobody to listen to. Everybody should be attached to somebody!
And think, when was the last time you asked advice? When was the last time that you had a conference with a talmid chochom? When was the last time you sought help from somebody who was capable of giving it? You never did it probably; that's a great error.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures. To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
Why is misas tzaddikim considered a kapara for the Jewish people?
ANSWER:
When we see how Hakadosh Baruch Hu takes away the righteous, and we think that that's the sof kol adam no matter who you are, the time will come.
Even this tzaddik has to pass away? So you begin realizing something you never thought about. It never occurred to you that someday you'll have to leave this world, that's the biggest surprise to most people. And even if they say, certainly I understand that, they don't believe it.
They think that only those people who belong to the shtarbers (dying) association are going to die; I never signed up in the shtarbers club. The awareness of death is so far away from us, had it been closer to us we would live a different life. We would try to utilize our days, to achieve more.Therefore misas tzaddikim is a great kapara for people who wake up and see: hurry up, hurry up.
Another thing is this, when you see tzaddikim who lived a perfect life, and they completed the job down to evening, at the end of their lives they continue to be perfect, it's a big inspiration.
Yeitzei adam l'foalo, yeitzu tzaddikim lkabeil s'choron vlavodoso adei erev, b'mi sh'hishlim avodoso adei erev (Baba metziah 83:2), those tzaddikim who remain tzaddikim all their years in old age to the last moments, these are the examples that inspire the world.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
שמעון בן שטח אומר הוי מרבה לחקור את העדים (אבות א:ט)
Shimon ben Shatach says, "Interrogate the witnesses extensively"
Once again, the simple interpretation explains this Mishna too as a directive limited to judges alone. The importance of interrogating the witnesses is abundantly clear. Although at face value it might seem that the testimonies of both witnesses are entirely compatible, however, when a judge probes a little deeper he might find inconsistencies which invalidate their testimonies. As a matter of a fact, the Rishonim write that Shimon ben Shatach's dictum was borne out of such a story of false testimony which had a profound effect upon him:
The Yerushalmi relates that Shimon ben Shatach, in accordance with the Torah dictates to kill a witch, hanged eighty witches in one day. The children of these women wished to take revenge and they hired two witnesses to falsely testify that Shimon ben Shatach's son was guilty of a sin deserving the death penalty. As a result of their testimony his son was taken to be killed. At that point the witnesses could no longer bear their guilt and they admitted their crime. Yet, unfortunately it was too late, since according to Torah law once testimonies have been cross examined and accepted, the witnesses have no right to renege on their word. From then on, Shimon ben Shatach would warn judges to interrogate the witnesses extensively, for had they grilled them a little more, maybe their testimony would never have been accepted in the first place.
Additionally, even when the witnesses actually observed everything that they related in court, not always are things how they seem at face value. The smallest piece of missing information can drastically affect how people perceive any given scenario. For a case in point we can borrow the Chafetz Chaim's well known mashal regarding a human being's perception of the events taking place in the world:
An ignorant fellow showed up in Shul and heard someone in the middle of davening (Ashrei) call out, "All those who love Him and all the wicked He will destroy." He pinches himself and he isn't dreaming! He really heard it with his two own ears and he simply can't believe it: "How could Hashem possibly destroy all His loved ones along with the wicked? He turns to the man sitting next to him and demands an explanation. "Don't be silly" he answers. "You showed up a second too late and didn't hear the first words of the pasuk, "Hashem protects all those who love Him (and all the wicked He will destroy)." What he heard, he heard correctly, but he was still missing an integral piece of the puzzle.
With this in mind, we will discover that the Tanna included in his proverb a lesson for each and every one of us. Often we are presented with testimony or proofs of some scenario that transpired. Not everything is as it seems at face value. This certainly goes for some of the things that we read in the news which were conveniently tailored by the media, and for all intents and purposes they are comparable to an entirely false testimony. (Once, a newspaper gave a short account of a Hachnasas Sefer Torah, and Rav Wolbe's son-in-law pointed out more than 10 untruths in the few lines! If that is true with regard to something that the reporter has no prejudice to misrepresent, how much more so does it apply to things that a journalist has a motive to misrepresent the facts).
Additionally, sometimes we hear a story and we can't believe our ears. Could Chaim Yankel really have done that? Hold on. Did we interrogate the witnesses extensively to see if they really know what happened down to the minutest detail? Do we really know what went on? For some reason it is always easier to just believe than to just not believe. Shimon ben Shatach teaches us to question our evidence before accepting them as truths.
A practical application to help implement this idea: We read emails all the time. Most of them are straightforward without any room for mistake. Then, there are those one or two emails written by someone you thought to be a friend, and you can't figure out how he could write something so callous! However, there is a problem with emails - you can't hear the "tone" that the email was written in. You took it one way and he meant something else. So, before you erupt, interrogate the witness and find out what he really meant. You will have not only become a talmid of Shimon ben Shatach, you will save yourself a lot of unnecessary heartache!
Correction: Last week due to a typo, the dvar Torah read: "In a similar vein, if one sees someone slip up, he should automatically write them off forever."
The correct sentence should read: In a similar vein, if one sees someone slip up, he should NOT automatically write them off forever.
We thank you for pointing out the mistake.
What's the comparison, the story of Korach with the sinkholes that occurred today in Florida?
ANSWER:
Now you have to understand, there is a statement of our chachomim, that some things were created from the beginning of the world, and that's pi ha'aretz, the mouth of the earth that swallowed up Korach.
Now listen carefully to the following, and don't repeat me in the wrong way. When it states that pi ha'aretz was prepared, it was a sinkhole; now this doesn't mean that it wasn't a miracle. If something natural happened in a remarkably fortuitous place, it's a nes. It was prepared. That's what our sages say, pi ha'aretz was prepared. There was a hollow, it was a certain weakness in the substance of the soil, it had been worn away by the removal of the water, and therefore the rock was soft and had been compacted, there was a lot of empty space down below, but it never could've happened just there, and it happened at the moment when it was necessary. That's what the gemara says.
Pi ha'aretz was prepared from the beginning of the world, but they came to that spot al pi Hashem, Hakadosh Baruch Hu guided them there. It was just at that spot where Korach and his company had put their tents, and when Moshe Rabbeinu gave them the ultimatum and they persisted in their insolence against him, at that time Hakadosh Baruch Hu's timetable commanded the sinkhole to open itself up.
Now don't go and tell people that I said it wasn't a nes; it was one of the greatest miracles. But when such a thing happens in the right time, in the right manner, it's a nes.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures. To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
ANSWER:
Those people who spend the summers in Switzerland, and the winters in the Caribbean, and the people who come home just for a little rest in between, these are unhappy people. If they liked their apartment then they wouldn't go anywhere else. The answer is, where they are now does not make them happy. Anybody who travels demonstrates that he's an unhappy person. That's why you have all these travel stores selling imagination, they sell imaginary happiness. The people who don't enjoy what they have here, so they tell him go to this and this place and here is where you're going to have a wonderful time, and we'll make money while we are deceiving you.
So in those days when the Chovos Halvavos spoke, he didn't have to convince people, people understood that it was silly to travel around; traveling is discomfort. Even if you're traveling in an air conditioned jet, it's uncomfortable. It's much more comfortable in your own home than in any kind of vehicle, no matter how you travel. I traveled already, and no matter what kind of accommodations anybody will get, it's nothing like home.
There is only one thing you will not get at home that you will get someplace else, and that's imagination. When you're traveling, even though the mosquitoes are biting you, even though the bathroom is not like your own bathroom, even though the food is not like the food you get at home, still you are consoled by the thought that soon you are going to have a good time. And you keep on pursuing, like a dog running after his own tail, till you get home again, and then you'll start yearning for the next journey.
Therefore these people, which means most of the people today, are unhappy people, that's why there is so much travel today. Even the people who travel to Eretz Yisroel, if they would travel to Eretz Yisroel just for a pilgrimage, for kedusha, is something else. They travel for fun; it's an excuse, instead of going to Switzerland they go to Eretz Yisroel.
I say stay home and send that thousand dollars or two thousand dollars for poor talmidei chachomim; give it to me and I'll disperse it for you. It will be a bigger mitzvah if the money goes there and you stay here. You'll enjoy yourself more and they'll enjoy themselves more.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
Parshas Beha'aloscha 5778
QUESTION:
Is it permitted to speak lashon horah against a wicked person in order to warn a righteous person away from him, or a child away from him?
ANSWER:
Now first you have to make sure that he is a rosho, because just because he's your landlord and he does not give heat in the way you want it, or because he is a competitor, doesn't make him a rosho. You have to be very careful before declaring he is a rosho. If you go to a competent Rov, a morah horah, and he'll pasken that this person is a rosho and you can talk loshon horah, so you can talk loshon horah, but you have to get a psak.
Don't rely on yourself, because in most cases, you are the one who is the rosho; that's most cases.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
This Bais Hamussar Dvar Torah is dedicated l'iluy nishmas hatinok Shlomo a"h ben yblch"t R' Avraham Yochonan Kaplan
May the zechus of his pure neshama hasten the geula!
ואל תתיאש מן הפרעניות (אבות א:ז)
Rashi explains how in a few words the Tanna succinctly conveyed two vital messages. The basic explanation understands the above axiom as a continuation of the first two ideas that this Tanna mentioned: "Stay away from bad neighbors and don't associate with wicked people." Even if success is smiling upon immoral people, and even if it continues year after year, know that it won't last forever. Do not despair of retribution since sooner or later a day of reckoning will come.
The Chafetz Chaim related (Netzach HaTorah chap. 3) that in Ayshashok (a small town near Radin) a shockingly cruel offense was committed. The butcher's son was abducted into the army and his father unsuccessfully tried everything possible to release his son from the long years of service that awaited him. Finally, he was told that if he would bring another boy as a replacement then his son would be freed for a price. The butcher went to the local Beis Medrash, snatched a boy who was learning, tied him up and brought him as a replacement for his son!
The entire town was outraged by the cruelty, but time and other suffering took their toll and the story was forgotten. That is, everyone forgot except the Chafetz Chaim. He waited to see what would transpire, and thirty years later he was given the answer. The butcher sent his son to buy cows and he was stung by an insect infected by a virulent disease. He called for help, but due to the contagious disease no one would get near him. Even after he died the Chevra Kadisha refused to deal with his body and the father himself had to take care of the burial. Everyone's compassion was aroused for the bereft father. Only the Chafetz Chaim remembered what had happened and thus knew that the butcher himself was to blame. He intended to save his child and he ended up burying his son with his own two hands.
Just because everything seems rosy, doesn't mean that it will always continue that way. Hashem is exceedingly kind and He waits for a person to repent from his errant ways. He might wait a week, a month, a year, or even a few decades, and one who is living a wayward life might presume that his bed of roses is indicative of God's approval of his behavior. This is not the case, and thus every person must make a personal reckoning, lest he G-d forbid encounter a day of reckoning.
Rashi writes that the Tanna is expressing yet another idea. One should not despair from any retribution that has been meted out to him. Even if the situation looks bleak to the point that there is no way for him to make it out alive, he should never despair.
The prophet Yeshaya was sent to tell King Chizkiyahu that he was about to die since he did not marry. Chizkiyahu requested to marry Yeshaya's daughter but he was told that it was too late since the decree was already sealed. He responded, "Yeshaya, leave and take your prophecy along with you! I have a family tradition that even if there is a sharp sword at one's neck he should not refrain from praying." Yeshaya left and Chizkiyahu turned his head to the wall and prayed from the depths of his heart, and was immediately answered. Yeshaya was sent back in to tell Chizkiyahu that his prayers had been accepted and he would live for another fifteen years!
There was no foreseeable way for Chizkiyahu to extract himself from his predicament. Nevertheless, he did not despair. No matter how depressing a situation one finds himself in, he should never ever give up. Hashem is omnipotent and Hashem is exceedingly kind, and this supreme combination is the recipe for salvation in the most unbelievable ways. Do not "throw in the towel," rather, "Throw upon Hashem your burden - and He will sustain you!" (Tehillim 55:23)
If a woman doesn't approve of her husband's righteousness, she doesn't approve of his learning Torah and doing mitzvos, is she going to share in the reward that he gains?
ANSWER:
Certainly not! Noshim b'mai kozachyin, how do women get zechus the Gemara asks. Now what question is that? How to get zechus? You could say women pray! Women have yiras shomayim, women raise their children, they cook and they clean the house, they do so many things, what's the question? Women can knock a mezuza on the door, woman can give tzedaka, but the Gemara asks in Torah how does a woman get zechus? A woman has to have zechus in Torah too. That's important, because Torah is the most important element; Torah is the mind element of the Jew.
Therefore the Gemara says, if she encourages her husband and her children to learn. By encouraging your husband to learn, not only encouraging him of course if you make meals for him you are also encouraging him. If you are doing all the duties that a woman should do at home, maintaining the home, you are also encouraging him. But if you say a word of encouragement and you don't discourage, then you get full share in all of his Torah.
If a boy learns and his mother doesn't disapprove, she gets a big share. If the mother says a kind word and she gives him a compliment for his learning, she gets a full share in her sons learning. So naturally you have to have an intention to encourage; then you get a full share.
Not a 50% share, she gets 100% share in her husband's Torah accomplishments.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures. To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
If being married is a necessity in receiving perfection, why did the Bnei Yisroel separate from their wives before the giving of the Torah?
ANSWER:
Everything has a time and a place. The Bnei Yisroel were not told to divorce their wives before Matan Torah, it was only three days of separation. And you have to know that although a man's career with his wife is a career of simcha and it helps him attain perfection, but there are times when for the purpose of greater perfection we yield smaller perfections. For three days they separated - a very small sacrifice - to demonstrate that they were getting ready for this great gift, the greatest gift that will ever be conferred by Hashem on anyone; the Torah.
That's what we find in the case of Rabbi Akiva and his wife, they separated even more, there the question is a bigger question, you can ask some more questions. Don't forget children could have been born during this time! People are willing to sacrifice - not by contraception - they are willing to sacrifice the pleasures, the benefits, and the achievements of married life, for the sake of greatness in Torah, these are the people who are marked for greatness.
In old generations this took place, there were Perushim in Europe who left home, they were not able to remain home and support a family, so their wives gave them permission or even told them to go. They went to other towns and they were Perushim, they sat and studied Torah. Some used to come home once a year to their families.
The Jewish nation is the nation that appreciates marriage more than anyone else. Marriage is a big mitzvah among Jews, and it's encouraged at anearly age, and every effort is made that everyone should be married. In true Jewish communities they marry off all unmarried people; nobody is allowed to remain unmarried in a real Jewish community. But, the true Jewish community understands also that for the sake of achievement in the service of Hakadosh Baruch Hu, the greatest sacrifices are worth offering.
And that's why we had great men in the past like Rabbi Akiva and others who were willing, with the assistance of great women who are behind them, to deny themselves the happiness and also the benefits of married life, for the sake of the achievements that they achieved for themselves and for theirpeople. The people benefited by them.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
ואל תתחבר לרשע... (אבות א:ז)
Do not associate with a wicked person...
The people with whom a person associates generally end up having a profound effect upon him. Shlomo Hamelech informs us (Mishlei 3:34), "If one associates with a scoffer, ultimately he will end up scoffing. [If one associates] with the humble, ultimately his actions will find favor in the eyes of men." Accordingly, the Tanna warns us not to associate with a wicked person.
So what is the Jew in exile, surrounded by gentiles, supposed to do? Where should he live and what vocation should he pursue? Wherever he goes and whatever job he chooses will most probably bring him in contact with less than pious individuals similar to those mentioned by the Tanna.
The answer can be found in the Torah. Forced to flee from his brother Eisav, Yaakov Avinu spends the following twenty years with his uncle Lavan. Lavan was not merely a trickster; he was downright wicked. The haggadah makes Pharoah look righteous in comparison to Lavan who endeavored to annihilate every last vestige of Judaism. Yet, Yaakov survived the ordeal without suffering from the negative influence of his employer. How did he do it?
Yaakov himself answers the question in the message he sent to Eisav: "I have sojourned with Lavan; and I observed the 613 mitzvos and did not learn from his evil ways" (Bereishis 32:5, as explained by Rashi). He emphasized the fact that although he spent twenty years in close proximity to Lavan, it was always as a sojourner, not as a settler. Lavan might have been his boss, but he never forged a relationship with him. While we live and work in close proximity with many secular people, we must ensure that we do not cultivate relationships with those who are immoral.
What could be so dangerous about a business relationship? After all, I certainly am not going to start acting in the decadent and sinful way that my associate behaves. The Bartenura cites the Medrash who compares the association with a wicked person to one who enters a tannery. Even if he leaves without taking a single item from the tannery, he will still give off a foul smell which he picked up from simply entering the building. Likewise, associating with wicked people will leave a person tainted even if he does not actually emulate their conduct.
While the Tanna referred specifically to wicked people, his instruction certainly applies to anything that is potentially wicked. Subscriptions to periodicals that contain unsuitable content, internet connections and contacts and spiritually questionable vacation spots are some examples of potentially dangerous things that can negatively influence a person. Yet, people assuage any feelings of guilt and assure themselves, "I know myself. I know how to be careful and I won't be negatively affected." Even if you are correct in your assessment and you won't change your conduct, you still wouldn't want to take the chance of ending up with a "foul smell." Instead, find someone (or something) who has the ability to positive influence you. That way, even if you don't succeed in emulating his actions, some of his "pleasant aroma" will rub off and aid you in your ascension up the spiritual ladder.
What are some of the good things that Hashem does through the yetzer hora?
ANSWER:
Now this question has a number of details, because the yetzer hora is detailed in a number of points. We will take up only one that I spoke about years ago.
One of the big forms of the yetzer hora is the desire for kovod, for glory. Now how can Hakadosh Baruch Hu make use of this to do great things? So the gemara says, v'ahavta es Hashem Elokecha b'chol l'vovecha, it says two times a beis, not one beis. So two beis'es means with shnei yitzrecho, the yetzer tov and the yetzer hora. How do you serve Him with the yetzer hora? With the yetzer hora means, I am going to do things for Hashem because I want glory! It's a good thing to do.
L'olam yasok adam torah umitzvos shelo lishma, you should do mitzvos, you should collect money for tzedaka, for yeshivos, just because you want the yeshiva to make a banquet in your honor, and don't be ashamed to say so. Collect money for a yeshiva or give money, in order that the yeshiva should make you a guest of honor, yes. Of course if you could do it and send in the $25,000 anonymously, with a postal money order - you can't send an unsigned private check, an anonymous check - but a postal money order; do so. But you won't? So therefore use the yetzer hora of kavod to do great things.
To sit and learn and know a perek of gemara, or a whole mesechta needs work, and therefore some people are not motivated to do it! But when you feel that for the sake of glory you want to do it, then go ahead. So that's one of the ways of utilizing the yetzer hora to do good things.
And never be ashamed to do good things even though you have ulterior motives. Don't say I won't do it because ulterior motives.Because if you won't do it then it's a failure!.
Hashem wants you to do it.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures. To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
Is it true that a man must let his beard grow fully and not shave?
ANSWER:
Let me tell you, I'm not a posek. I am just going to tell you what the practice has been in all the yeshivas, even in Europe; that unmarried men did clip their faces. Therefore nobody has a right to claim that if you don't grow a beard you're a sinner. It's nothing but a very big exaggeration.
The gedolei Yisroel that grew up in Europe didn't have beards when they were boys. I'm not saying it's wrong to have a beard, but for somebody to come out and to make propaganda that it's a sin, it's certainly not the truth.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
A baal teshuva meets an old friend who reminds him of the good old days?
ANSWER:
And the answer is, we do what it says in Mishlei (17:12). It says: p'gosh dov shakul b'ish v'al ksil b'ivalto, better to encounter an enraged bear then to meet a fool with his foolishness. If you see an enraged bear coming down the street, so you don't think I'll walk by him on the sidewalk… No! You take a taxi. And if you see a fool coming down the street it's worse. If you see an old friend with whom you used to sin together in the bad old days, so turn around and run; you don't know him.
Don't tell me any stories, I'll make him repent, I'll change him; worry about yourself first. If a man comes down the street and he's diseased with a terribly contagious disease, and he's breathing germs, are you going to stand there and embrace him? Even though you want to help him out and give him medicine, nothing doing. Who cares about medicine, chayeco kodmin, you turn around and run, you wouldn't even come within ten feet of him. And that's the treatment to good old friends.
I had a case like that, a young man, so I turned him back, I got him off of pot; he stopped. I told him to go to work and he got a job. But I told him nothing will help if you still meet your old friends. It was breaking his heart however. I said look, if you don't give up your old friends then give me up, because I can't help you if you are going to continue meeting them. If you meet wicked friends who still indulge in all this stupidity of the narcotics culture, so called, so you won't make anything out of yourself.
You must break off with your friends.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
What is the single best way to get along with people?
ANSWER:
The single best way to get along with people min Hatorah, is to keep your mouth shut. Now that doesn't mean that it's the only best way, you asked me for the single best way, because you need more than that. But there is no question that the mouth is the cause of most dissension.
So if you have something good to say, certainly that's a better way, you can talk diveri shalom v'emes, but if you're not capable the best thing is not to say anything.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
Yom Hashoah, that's Holocaust day, where did it originate and should we observe it?
ANSWER:
It originated from people who are atheists. In the Knesset most of them are atheists. So when people get together, a 'sanhedrin' of great sages without hats, who sit together and they decide to decree a National day of observance for all Jews, you understand the kedusha that lies in it.
Should we observe it? We should ignore it.
What should we do? We'll leave that to the chachmei hatorah; we don't hurry to make days of observances. The chachmei hatorah will do in good time what has to be done, but never should we recognize any kind of pronouncements by atheists.
Good Shabbos to all.
L’zecher nishmas Rav Avigdor Hachohein Miller Ben Reb Yisroel whose yartzeit is today 27th Nissan
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
Why is it that a Kohein who became blemished in one of his limbs is disqualified from service in the sanctuary? The man has a pure heart, and his intentions are noble, so why should externality disqualify him?
ANSWER:
This man can receive full reward for his good intentions, but Hakadosh Baruch Hu deals with the world according to the laws of human nature. And human nature is that they have respect for perfect things. We want his service to make the proper impression on thebeholders.
A Kohein by the way can't have any soiled garments, the garment must be pure white, and he must be perfect in his externality. Not only that, his demeanor, he's trained how to behave, like a prince, like a king. And so when you are a visitor and you view the avodas beis hamikdash, and you see these noble men walking in the azara with fear of Hakadosh Baruch Hu and with utmost dignity, and everything is done as in the service accorded to a king, it fills your heart with reverence and you yourself are impressed to such a big extent, that you go home with memories that you'll hold forever; you'll think about the service of Hashem. Therefore for the purpose of the impression, it's important to maintain the externalities.
That's why we have to honor Hashem with all external honors. We shouldn't say what difference does it make if I put my tefillin in a worn out, torn tefillin bag? No! Put it in a beautiful bag. You might say what difference does it make if I'll carry my Esrog in a paper bag, why not put it in a shopping bag? No! Carry your Esrog if possible, if you can afford it in a silver box, let the world see how precious it is to you, that will impress them, and people are impressionable.
It's important to impress others, and to impress ourselves. That's why externalities are very important.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures. To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
Should a man say a tefilla, should he pray even though he does not know the meaning of the words?
ANSWER:
Yes, because that's Hareini es marayich (show Me your appearance, Shir Hashirim 2:14), that's a Jewish way of life; a Jew has to learn to show devotion to Hashem. If he stands up and he bows down to Hashem, that itself is a demonstration of devotion. If a Jew says the words, he knows he's speaking to Hashem; it's a demonstration of devotion. Therefore by all means he should pray even though he does not know the translation.
However, isn't it a great pity that a Jew should waste the opportunity? Because from prayer you can come to greatness. You develop your soul, your emotions, your intellect by prayer; prayer is really a study of great principles.
Who made the prayers? There are selections from the Chumash, there are selections from Tehillim, and some are composed by Anshei Knesses Hagedolah, the great sages, so every word is imbued with deep meaning.
Therefore every Jew should make an attempt to understand, all his life to study more and more deeply the meaning of the prayers. But he shouldn't wait until he does, because right now it's a virtuous achievement to pray.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
What is the significance of all the details of the measurements of the Mishkan, and other details in other subjects of the Torah?
ANSWER:
You have to realize there are a number of cases when these measurements are of utmost importance to us even today. First of all, there is a question of corroboration. If we want to know the reliability of a document, so we try to find contradictions in the document.
Now, when somebody wants to write a false document, he puts in as few details as possible, so it should be more difficult to catch him in a self-contradiction. Cunning liars always speak as little as possible. If you have to lie on the witness stand, so try to say as little as possible; it's good advice, it may happen someday. Or if you are being cross examined, the less information you volunteer the better off you are, because when you say more things it's easier to trip you up.
L'havdil elef havdolos in the new testament, when it tells about a certain miracle, details are omitted. It's a general thing, oso ha'ish stood on a mountain and he was transfigured, and he looked like something that came from above, and the people fell down and worshiped him, and that's the whole story. But let's have some more details, after all it was such a big event the way they describe it, there must've been a lot of people of the Jews who didn't approve, what did they say?
It's a queer thing, in all these stories the only witnesses were the believers. You mean to say that the majority of the Jews in Eretz Yisroel believed that? The majority didn't believe! All of the sages disbelieved.
It's an interesting thing, in all the stories, not one sage was ever present. Why didn't they have Rabbon Gamliel present, or any of the old sages, so let them disagree... No. In all the stories, the stories are made as simple as possible, it shouldn't be complicated, there shouldn't be any questions asked.
The Torah purposely tells details upon details, and that's one of the ways of checking, by crosschecking. It's surprising how much information can be gained by checking one place with another. For instance, if you want to know how precise was the number of 600,000 Jews that left Egypt. 600,000 males, now that's a big number, and apikorsim like Ben Gurion and others deny it. But if you crosscheck you see, that the donation of a machtzis ha'shekel that they gave for the Mishkan, could only come to such big sums from 600,000 people. It's been calculated, even gentiles calculated this, and it was only possible from a huge multitude.
So when you crosscheck, you're able to verify the credibility of these reports. The measurements are not only given here, they are mentioned more than once, they are related once in the command to do it, they're related later when he relates how it was done, it was fulfilled, and again and again a number of times.
Therefore this gives us an excellent opportunity for crosschecking, and that's just one of the reasons for writing these things in the Torah. When the Torah tells us the genealogical tablets of the nations, and the Torah tells us who begot whom, and how the nations fanned out from one individual to a number of families, it gives credibility to the Torah, because you see here a logical sequence how the families spread, how all the Semitic families came from Shem, and all the Hamitic families came from Cham, and you understand the relationship between the families. Therefore it gives plausibility, because in the days of old when people were closest to the sources, it was easier for them to check on these things.
So one of the reasons is, to help verify the truthfulness of the Torah.
Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
Why do Lubavitcher chassidim consider themselves superior to Litvishe Jews?
ANSWER:
First of all, Lubavitcher chassidim are mostly Litvishe Jews, you have to know. They are Litvishe Jews. And if they consider themselves superior, so we can ask the question, why do most non-Lubavitcher chassidim consider themselves superior to Lubavitcher chassidim? Or why do Breslover chassidim consider themselves superior to Lubavitcher chassidim? And why do Satmar chassidim consider themselves superior to Breslover chassidim?
The answer is, all idealists who follow certain systems, do it because they think it's the best system, otherwise they would follow a different system. It's common sense. Why should a man be a Lubavitcher if he thinks something is better? Why shouldn't a man be a non-Lubavitcher, if he thinks it's better than Lubavitch?
All idealists follow the system that they think is the best. Now who is going to be the arbitrator on who is the best? Moshiach will come, and in order to keep peace with everybody he will say you are all the best! And the truth is, they are all the best, but right now it's not the question if the Lubavitcher feels superior. Ask a Litvishe Yeshiva bachur, he feels superior! Ask a Satmar, he feels superior! And go into a Sephardic Yeshiva in Eretz Yisroel, in Porat Yosef, he's superior! So everybody is superior!
And the answer is that's how idealists have to be. No idealist will do something that he thinks is inferior.
A Freilichen Purim Good Shabbos To All
This is transcribed from questions that were posed to Harav Miller by the audience at the Thursday night lectures.
To listen to the audio of this Q & A please dial: 201-676-3210
Important Numbers
